Back again... why won't anyone listen?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by xTheBlondex, Nov 30, 2009.

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  1. xTheBlondex

    xTheBlondex Well-Known Member

    I've finally ran back to the arms of SF.. this place seems to be the only place I can talk and not be told I'm stupid , or the famous words "Pull your socks up, just get on with it".

    Saturday.. I really just wanted to leave the world.. I checked my drawer (the one I hoard the tablets in).. I even a wrote a note only to be disturbed by my mum yet again.. I told her once again how I felt and she just didn't seem to be handle it , Patronised me and made flipant comments.

    For the last three years I've been to the doctors at least 6/7 times (with varying and some times quite long lengths inbetween), I feel unable to go back incase they think I'm a hypochondirac or I want some sort of label placed on myself (of course I'm aware this may all be in my head.. none the less it's still there).

    I know how I feel isn't right.. It's not right to feel this low and to prepare and almost fantasize about dying.. from doing something directly or something indirectly like wishing a bus or a car.. or the airplane I'm on will just crash and kill me. I know I'm depressed.. I know that crying almost on a daily basis trying to stay in my room for as long as possible even not drinking alot so I don't have to bump into any of my family members whilst going downstairs to go to the toilet, sometimes not sleeping at all and sometimes sleeping all day.. finding any reason to leave lectuers early so I don't have to speak to the people on my course.. walking home in the rain so I don't have to catch the bus with loads of people. Sometimes not even looking in the mirror because I can't cope with seeing my own face. I know it isn't right - so why does my doctor keep sending me in different directions and not helping? I don't understand...? :sad:
  2. Terror

    Terror Well-Known Member

    From my own personal experience, YOU can be guided and be given the tools that will assist you to make thing right with you. But you have to really want it.

    Words of John McDonald From "The Message of A Master"

  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    If you need help go to the hospital emerg and tell them you need help as youare wanting to kill yourself there they will put you in hospital where you will get medication to help you and some therapy. Better yet phone your doctor and tell him you want to go to hospital vulonteer basis for a few days to get assessed for diagnosis and get medication to start stabilizing you make it happen okay you deserve help.
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