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Back again :/

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by thots82, Jan 24, 2011.

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  1. thots82

    thots82 Member

    It seems that writing on here a few times this week helped a little so I return.
    I got out of hospital this evening and I've just woke up again so evidentally I couldn't cope last night. I don't think I had any intention of ending it all, just really wanted to sleep and everything to go away, which it did for a while. The sleepy effects are wearing off now.
    I feel I do want to get better but I'm not sure if I can cope while I wait for my medication to be sorted and to get into my system again. And I don't really believe that will solve everything anyway.
    I suffer with a lot of anxiety and panic attacks so I always need something to keep my mind off it but I require more and more intense distractions, such as the OD last night. I was considering self harm as I did that years ago but so far I haven't and so I am here, wasting a bit of time and keeping my brain busy instead.
    It all feels so very unreal. Almost like I'm not fully connected to my body. It's going to be a long few hours but I'm back on my medication now so we shall see.
    I can't believe this is me saying all this. I was happy in the past and now all I think about is negativity.
    Anyway, better writing and getting things out than doing 'other things'.
  2. RDF

    RDF Guest

    I'm new to the forum and I am finding them helpful also. If you read my other post about rdf you'll see that I also do things to occupy my mind and have been having trouble sleeping. I hope your meds help and maybe we can chat sometime.
  3. tappa

    tappa Well-Known Member

    the meds may not change EVERYTHING but sounds like u need all the help u can get. Including the support here :)
    Do u have any hobbies to keep ya mind off things like reading or such?
    If not snappy elastic bands on ya wrist is a gd release of ya frustration, i find it can keep me ocupied for sometime increasing the intensity
  4. Ravenwing

    Ravenwing Well-Known Member

    You are doing the right thing by talking about things on here. It certainly helps. Glad to hear that you are back on your meds. Just take things slowly. :hug:
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi i am glad to see you writing and i hope you continue to reach out for support here. I hope medical treatment kicks in soon for you to so you start feeling better hugs
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