back at it and dont want to stop

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by allofme, Sep 6, 2006.

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  1. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    been cuting for days.. deeper and deeper... still bleeding... dont care... am sick of hiding it.. i wish the world would go away...
  2. helena

    helena Staff Alumni

    :hug: :hug:
    I so very much wish the same, and if the world stays...I'll go!(don't realy know when or how....:huh: )
    I am so sorry though you've been hurting yourself for days and
    getting worse on the cuts....please try to stop , dear, find something else to get the relieve or what it is that you get from self harm....I allways say I don't know much about it,and it's still true, but I don't judge, I don't in general anyway.I just worry, I feel affraid for your safety,I care so much for you that I really hate to think you are hurting multiply, I mean I guess it's the hurt inside that makes you harm yourself isn't it?
    I hope things get better, I would do a lot to take your pain away, if someone could carry the suffer for the rest of the people that are in pain, I would vollunteer happily.
    Please take care and stay safe
  3. consciousinsane

    consciousinsane Well-Known Member


    That is the most sincere and caring message I've read on this forum yet!


    I don't have a solution for you, but I can understand what you are going thru. For the past week I have been getting more and more depressed and hurt inside. I have started cutting too....deeper and deeper. So don't feel as though you are all alone. I'm right there struggling with you. It helps just to know your not all alone. I hope you are able to stay safe and not hurt yourself too bad. Hang in there!
  4. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    thank you so much helena... your genuine concern has helped.. thank you...
    i do hope you feel beter too... hugs..
  5. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni


    thank you too... you do not even know me.. we have not met . in a post or chat ... but u took some time to recognize and validate my pain.. thank you ...
  6. helena

    helena Staff Alumni

    :hug: :) ...glad to hear it helped, dear,
    you are welcome anytime.I'm doing ok.
    Stay safe and take care,

    thanks consciousinsane :)
  7. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    again thank you helena...
    i am still bleeding some.. but it is healing.. thank you for caring..
  8. Allo..

    Allo.. Well-Known Member

    stay strong, you can get thru it x
  9. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    thank you all.. i am staying as strong as is possible.. the wound is healing some.. and i fight the urges to make more...
  10. WeepingWillow

    WeepingWillow Well-Known Member

    keep fighting. please. it's not an endless cycle. _keep trying_ :angel:
  11. consciousinsane

    consciousinsane Well-Known Member

    Your doing great allofme! I'm proud of you!!
  12. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    thank you for all the support.. i just take it minute by minute... if the truth me told i would be doing it if there were no in arond that would see it.. the other wounds have stopped bleeding ... i wish ... well i will keep that to meself..slept for 20 hours yesterday ... dont remember much of this past week.... except .... again thank you for your support.. i come here when i want to be reminded someone cares.. everyone hang in there... i so much want your lives to be filled with joy and hope.. and love..
  13. kath

    kath Well-Known Member

    im late posting here.Only just seen this.So worried about you.Please know you can always talk to me.You dont need to hide or not say not going to judge.i am here but wish i could do more.i feel inadequate.i hear your pain through your writing and i am so proud you made this thread.i hope it has helped you in some way.You have been there a lot for me and now please let me be there for you.......i could never repay you enough for all that youve done for not just saying those words.i mean it.i could never thank you or repay you enough but i am here for you and i think thats the least i can do.i know how hard it can be not to cut or do other things especially when you have repeated urges and they are so strong.If you ever need a friend,or to talk,or just someone to sit with or chit chat wiht im here and lplease feel fre to contact me by email or PM anytime at all.It is always good to hear from just sorry i cant be more use hun.Many big kath hugs if wanted!How are you?

    Please take good care and hope you are as safe as possible.
  14. resistance

    resistance Staff Alumni

    Hey hun, I'm sorry I only just seen this thread, how are you doing now? I too worry about you and I so wish I could help in taking your pain away. You're a great person, you've been there for me and so many other people and I would like to give you support and love whenever you need it. I know I'm hardly ever online AIM, I really should go on there more often but whenever you want to chat and I'm not online just drop me a PM. Big hugs. :hug:
  15. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    kath and resistance

    thank you again for the support.. it means alot... hugs..
  16. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Just wondered how things were going for you hun. I hope you are doing well. Love ya lots. I wish I could take every ounce of pain from you and restore you hun. :hug:
  17. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    dont really think i can break this cycle.. i have been living in quick sand... i sink.. than hold my ground for a bit... maybe even crawl out some of the way ... but ulitmately i begin to sink again.. i guess i will just sink until my head is fully covered by the crap of life... i found a new way to self harm.. it is not as detectable as the cutting.... i still would rather cut .. but this will have to do for now.. i spent the day thinking of how i could resolve my problems... realistically .... i just dont see it...
  18. deathdealer

    deathdealer Guest

    i know how you were feeling, i hope you are coping better now,i too have been tempted to self harm again lately but im with holding the urge.when i read posts like yours it takes me back to how i used to be and the feelings that i used to through the worst of it all now and am determined not to go back again. feel free to pm me also, we are always here and we can atleast say genuinely that we have been where you are now.its a dark world where you are at the moment but you will come through the other side,just as we all have.we also know its a hard path to take.we have the scars to prove where we have been and our way of saying thankyou to the ones who helped us is to help people like yourself.stick with it and i promise that you will make it.:smile:
  19. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    same here i'm sick of this dumb stupid world. i hate this F***k'n world i hate my elf i am ugly. eveyone else is so prettier than me i wish i was dead.

    i am going to leave this world soon
  20. allofme

    allofme Staff Alumni

    thank you deathdealer

    i do know that i can live and survive without cutting.. i have gone a long time prior to this bout of SH... i hope i will get back to the place you are.. keep up he good work and stay strong.. i hope your desier to SH .. vanishes along with your scars.. thank you for your support... hugs
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