Bad Adverts

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Spikey, May 14, 2007.

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  1. Spikey

    Spikey Senior Member

    For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.

    Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.

    Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too.

    Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.

    Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.

    We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.

    For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.

    For Sale -- Eight puppies from a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy.

    Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.

    Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

    Vacation Special: have your home exterminated.

    Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge.
    Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.

    Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress,
    but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else.

    Stock up and save. Limit: one.per person

    For Rent: 6-room hated apartment.

    Man, honest. Will take anything.

    Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, £200 a month. References required.

    Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.

    Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person.

    Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.

    Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

    3-year-old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.

    Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

    Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.

    Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.

    Illiterate? Write today for free help.

    Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties.
    Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.

    And now, the Superstore--unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience.
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

  3. Wonderstuff

    Wonderstuff Staff Alumni

    :laugh: stop, stop! I think my parents were wondering what I was laughing at last night with the Dirty Sweets thing, and now I've just spent twenty minutes reading your other posts here and laughing. :poke:
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    You think thats bad Lauren :blink: I started with one..kept finding another more and more trapped in laughter... so by the time I got to the sweets...bladder control was a thing of the past :shy::laugh:
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