I woke up this morning just feeling blah. I'm in a very unorthodox relationship and this morning when I woke up felt very needy and like i'm last in our relationship. I know I'm being ridiculous and my partner J does not need me to be acting this way, she just heard yesterday her mother's cancer spread to her brain and she has less than 2 weeks to live. *sigh* today is the first day in months that I wish I had my knife. Wish I could stop myself from being so ridiculous, I know a big part of it is because I am tired. Ugh, I suck.