Bad Day :(

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Leiaha, Jul 1, 2009.

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  1. Leiaha

    Leiaha Well-Known Member

    The last few days I have felt things slipping again :(

    Why is it that when you think things are starting to look up and, you start to feel better about things, about life, about yourself, fate sends everything crashing in around your ears again?

    A great big fat slap or five just to remind you that.........

    yes, you are actually a loser, always were, always will be!
    Yes, you are a waste of space, always were, always will be!
    Yes, you are all alone, always were, always will be!
    No, you are not important, despite what others kindly tell you to make you feel better.
    No, it will never change, just a series of cruel hoaxes to knock you further back down when the fall descends yet again.
    Yes, you are a freak, a nobody and should never have been born.
    NO, you shouldn't still be here, you have no purpose, fate awaits its fullfillment :(

    I am an idiot who still tries to cope and make a difference,I need to learn to quit, accept the innevitable.

    Just sounding off, ignore me, I finally accept :(

    Lea :hug:
  2. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    :hug: sorry things are going so bad for you right now.
    i hope that you feel better for getting it off your chest.
    i'm just heading to bed as i have a headache so i don't have any pearls of wisdom for you right now unfortunately, but if you ever need to talk, my pm box is always open, i'm happy to listen and help if possible :)
    take care. :hug:
  3. elvinchild

    elvinchild Well-Known Member

    I know how that feels :-( My life is so back and forth like that! I really feel like I have a dark fate.

    I would like to think however that maybe its just our deep pain/depression and pessimism talking, and that things are truly as awful as we see them to be.
  4. Leiaha

    Leiaha Well-Known Member

    Thanks for your replies :)

    I dont think its my illness making things seem worse than they are because of one thing in particular....... my 2 daughters (neither of which have any mental illness) both agree with me.
    I'm not talking normal ups ands downs. 1 of my uncles, 2 of my aunts, 1 cousin and my 17 yr old daughters friend, have all died so far this year and we're only half way through!!
    Last year 2 Great Aunts, 1 uncle, 3 friends, a friends baby and others died. 11 in alllast year.
    Also family trouble, etc...... etc......
    I just get the feeling that every time I relax, fate gives me a huge reminder of what I should have done long ago and keep putting off :(
  5. ZombiePringle

    ZombiePringle Forum Buddy and Antiquities Friend

    There is always a chance for it to get better. you could wake up tomorrow and have something amazing happen. There is almost always a reason to keep fighting. In this case it would probably be your daughters try and stay strong for them. as best as you can.
  6. ~Claire

    ~Claire Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry things are still so difficult for you Lea.

    Thinking of you & sending you lots of hugs.

    :console: xx
  7. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    Lea, sorry to hear you are feeling so bad. Don't give up though and don't believe any of those things you have listed about yourself. You are a good, caring person. Generally around if you need a chat and if you need any other help or support I can give you only have to ask. Be strong. Best wishes.
  8. Leiaha

    Leiaha Well-Known Member

    Thanks everyone :)
  9. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

  10. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Leiaha :hug:

    I'm sorry to hear you're still struggling. Keep fighting, one day at a time. You'll get through it. I'm always here if you need to talk :arms:
  11. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I hope tommorrow will be a better day Show your daughters you are a fighter a survivor let them see it can be done. Why not take them out to beach or shopping spend some time just enjoying each others company. Take care of you okay
  12. Aimee_in_Wonderland

    Aimee_in_Wonderland Well-Known Member

    Im sorry you've had a bad day.
    i hope things get better for you and tomorrows a brighter day x
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