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Badly messed up a simple situation

#1
I am extremely volatile person. I am not going hard on myself. I am this way, and recently have been being extremely rude a minute and really caring another minute. I don't think it is to clinical extent and maybe if I practice observing my mood swings I can control it.

So, I went to a restaurant with my roommates A1, A2, S and her boyfriend H. I was getting drunk and I was being loud and a bit rowdy like ! Subconsciously I have been noticing that A2 and H have been talking very closely and when being drunk I noticed it again and made some weird gestures to S hinting it and told on face to A2 and H that the way they were behaving wrong ! A2 took it okay she dint get offended whereas H the boyfrined of S did take offence and said I was weird and to the extent that I was judging his character.. Until then I was keeping my cool, and the moment I was called on my face that what I said was offensive, I lost all the cool, I started swearing at them, stormed out of the restaurant, A1 tried to calm me down and I yelled at her too, we reached home I locked myself and cried all night ! I have been feeling bad the day after and apologized to A2 and S, while A2 did take it well again S dint and it made me even sadder. I left the house to calm myself down. I thought it will be a sweet gesture to buy a cake saying "Sincerely Sorry" and went back to the house and saw all of them heading out for an event, I tried to talk to H and S and the kind of disgusted unbothered look they gave me brought tears to my eyes ! ..

At the end A1 and A2 said that if I had said the sorry just minutes after I said A2 and H were misbehaving this wont have gone to being an issue at all and might have forgotten it long back !

Right now, I did my part, I said Sorry. At the end of it we are just roommates trying to co exist. I am not going to say Sorry anymore and if S or H are not willing to talk to me, then let it be ! I cant get myself hurt again !

But this is a lesson for life ! other people's business/shit is really none of my problem.. Just shut that damn mouth, if you dont have anything nice to see at all ! Thanks for reading through my long rant ..
 
#2
Also I feel stupid to have bought that cake ! But yeah, I guess it does not matter now ! I was thinking in my last year of 20's I will do less things that I would regret ! And look what I just did *rofl*rofl
 

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