Hello all, I had always thought that I was "too strong" to ever even consider suicide, but I guess strength has nothing to do with it when you really have lost everything you thought was worth living for. I am an alcoholic because it just helps me deal with everything I've ever destroyed in my life. I'm always sad because my father, the only parent that I really, truly have loved in my entire life, never views me as being good enough. I have had a psychiatric diagnosis ruin my life and alongside that one, I have been struggling with two seperate personalities for months now, and still cannot choose which side I belong on. Even when I am drinking, I am still anorexic/bulimic, because I will always view myself as fat. I have also recently lost the love of my life due to a very very VERY poor decision I had made about a year ago. Can someone please help me find something worthwhile about my life? It would be much appreciated.