become an addiction

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Hache, Mar 23, 2008.

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  1. Hache

    Hache Well-Known Member

    :sad: its become an addiction now

    I think i do it to attention seek, but not to anyone but myself, i know that doesnt really make sense, but sometimes i think i am doing it to convince myself of depression and how bad things are. When i very first did it last year it gave off an amazing release. Heat of the moment kind of thing. I dont seem to get that anymore. I find myself wanting to reach for the knife 3 or 4 times a day. I have made a mess of my arm but the parts that are recovering i want to do over again, i want to see blood and marks of pain :blink:

    what is going on?
     
  2. Ire

    Ire Guest

    Sometimes I feel like that too.

    At times I cut even when I don't feel that depressed... it's like I feel like I ought to be doing it, since that's what I usually do when I am alone at night. Usually just a few light slashes suffices on those nights.
    Then, sometimes I do it... and I don't even feel relief anymore. It's like some wierd habit that I have to do... I dont even know.
    Still other times, it's the only thing keeping me alive. I just don't get it...

    Wish I could tell you what was going on :huh:
     
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