Been awhile....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by PyRoK, Jul 30, 2007.

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  1. PyRoK

    PyRoK Member

    I haven't posted for awhile because i was feeling much better about myself. Throughout the last 2 months I have been on a downhill slope. My life has shattered into millions of pieces. I'll start from the beginning. I stopped seeing my therapist because I believed he did nothing for me. I was suppose to go on anti-deppresants, but that never materialize. I'm doing alot of drugs, which I don't think help. I need to escape and that's the easiest way. I live with my dad, but he drinks so much. It's hard to call him my dad anymore. My mom lives states away from me. I want to live with her but courts are to expensive. My dad is afraid he'll lose his job and keeps playing me like a piano. He told me a few days ago that I was moving back with my mom. He once again went back on his word. I'm spiraling downward and I don't know what to do. I need help but I'm afraid to say anything. I'm afraid of ridicule from everyone. I feel like I've disappointed everyone. I can't go on like this...
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Firstly, you have not failed...life is a collection of ups and downs...and it seems the downs bite us in the backside way too often...sorry to hear about how you are doing, but know you are always welcome...and as far as ridicule is concerned...everyone's stuff smells...and Lord knows, mine echoes my failures and disorder...so no judgement here...big hugs, Jackie
     
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    It is good to see you back PyRok. I can't say what the court system is like now as far as moving from one parent to the other, but when I was 14 I decided i was going to live with my father instead of my mother. My parents did not go through the court system at all. My sister and I packed up and left and that is where we stayed except for occasional visits. I don't know if this would be possible in your case or not, but I am in the USA. I know several of my students have also changed residences from on parent to the other and they never went through court. You may need to get back in touch with your therapist. Sometimes we feel as if we are going nowhere when in actuality we are making good progress. It takes time to help what it took seconds to destroy. Please don't give up the ghost yet. Keep trying. Look into other possibilities. Something is out there waiting somewhere. :hug:
     
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