1. hi my name is

    hi my name is Well-Known Member

    so i was sitting in my car last night pretending to be at my job which my rents don't know i quit yet because there was no point as i should have been dead by this saturday. i had everything planned so perfectly as i found the best way to go about it which was definite, pain free, and quick. then i had a spiritual experience where i was shown that by submitting to god's will i will be taken care of. i have never been a believer until last night and now when i read the bible a lot of it makes sense and comes to me naturally. i have to say that by submitting to his will , which was what i have been trying to do all of my life until i put up false beliefs which my heart wasn't in line with, it makes you realize that there is something much more bigger then you are. and in my heart i feel like i have been given this situation. i imagine myself as a part of the immune system of the earth and feel like i havent been doing a very good job. if your bodies immune system wasn' acting out to it's full potential a lot of you is going to hurt. just as mother earth is hurting. and i feel as though through the will of god i have to link up with other "immune system buddies" and through unity we will eventually put an end to a lot of injustices in the world. just watch me i am making a living sacrifice out of the love of everthing unconditionally. another lesson i learned is that the best jobs in the world DON"T require a resume!!! if anyone feels me on this i would love to get in contact with you and maybe guide you through what god's will is if you have not found it yet.

    just on a side note. i can never look up at space the same. what i literally see is the insides of a body which itself has it's own consciousness. although this is not the best description but it's as if your abdominal muscle looked up and said hey that's the ribcage up there! then figuring that they are both a part of the same body and not seperate
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I am glad you found a reason to stay alive I hoope you stay strong and well.
     
  3. hi my name is

    hi my name is Well-Known Member

    thank you so much i dug myself such a huge whole and totally disrespected my life to the lowest point i never thought i would make it out i'm still a little sensitive but i am recovering well