Been Struggling

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by brknsilence, Jan 28, 2016.

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  1. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    I'm so exhausted. Tired of struggling. Yesterday, wasn't a good day. I ended up self harming. Wanted to do more but tried my best to pull through the day. Just woke up this morning feeling sad. Just wishing for better days but not seeing it. My thoughts hasn't been well still. I was close to calling a hotline yesterday but didn't want the police showing up. I just feel so hopeless. I don't know what else to do.
     
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Call the samaritans if you feel like phoning someone, they will not call the police on you, just listen patiently. They are superb,, an excellent support. I am sorry you are feeling so down and fed up, is there anything I can do to help? And please remember that no matter what happens we are here for you.
     
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  3. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thanks for being there. I just feeling really sad. Tired of these thoughts.
     
  4. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    Hello, I am really sorry to know about that. I understand that some days are just too much to take, You must be so overwhelmed by those thoughts but You shouldn´t give up on fighting back, I know it´s tiring and probably there are times You wonder why You still fight if nothing seems to change but trust me, even if You can´t see changes right now, they are occuring just because of the fact that You are struggling, changes are happening within yourself even if You feel hopeless sometimes, the best advice I can give You is not to give up, another one is, do not give space to pessimism, even the pessimistic thoughts which seem to be small and not important, they matter too.

    Our hearts get lost not because it loses big parts of it all at once, we lose pieces, small pieces over time and only get to realize when a big part of us is lost and weak. Try to clear your mind, not by using any kinda strategy to forget about what goes on within yourself but by fighting those thoughts with the thoughts You want to be the ones in charge in your mind.

    I have no idea what your life has been like but I beleive You can overcome whatever it is, if your sadness is about someone or people, perhaps this is a time You should take to develop some self confidence and not put yourself low or feel low before them, if that sadness has been part of yourself, then You should look back at it´s origins, at it´s sources and come up perhaps with the courage You didn´t have before or with the strength, or with the patience or even forgiviness. Only You know what are the sources of your pain and only You know which kinda attitudes and feelings are missing within yourself, the ones that can actually help You rise up

    When You struggle and fail, do not lose hopes or blame yourself for not being strong enough, failure is part of the process of gaining strength and wisdom so next time You struggle You add up more within yourself and gain power enough to struggle better, until You face your problems and get them down independenly of what they are or how long they´ve been with You . it´s not impossible, it takes a lot of patience and a lot of struggling and belief, believe in yourself, do not let any failures or anyone or any thought makes You believe that You can´t .

    Take care and I hope You will succeed on your battles
     
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  5. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thank you
     
  6. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    No need to thank me, just really hope You consider what I said
    You shouldn´t give up, your scars can heal and You can be well again
     
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  7. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    I'm just tired of struggling. :(
     
  8. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    Is it because of your failures ?
     
  9. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Some of it. Other part is this depression and eating disorder. Doesn't want to go away. I'm exhausted in dealing with it. Feeling hopeless this will get better. 22 years and still not over. Nothing has been working.
     
  10. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    Perhaps You believe nothing has been working because You still struggle with it but I am sure You learned a lot of things, maybe just didn´t put into practice or had the perseverence to hang on and not let yourself fall during difficult moments. I know it ain´t easy, we learn a lot of things when it comes to theory, putting into practice is what is hard, specially because we can only practice when we face difficulties, not when things are well and calm.

    I am so sorry to know You´ve been suffering for so long, i can imagine how much tired You are and that probably there´s many horrible thoughts coming to your mind to make You believe that this or that will be a escape and end for your pain but I hope You know such thoughts are false, they just wanna see us end our lives in misery because they come from the fruits of depression

    Your heart must be full of fruits from depression but giving up is not what it wants. Having depression is a huge battle, it´s like we have our own thoughts and beliefs and they get mixed with those thoughts and attitudes that depression forces on us

    I think that your eating disorder will lose it´s power when You gain more control of your mind and have more peace in your heart, I think it is a symptom, not a source You need to focus on fighting, although You should try to control yourself more

    You will get better if You continue fighting, I am sure You have been and a lot but do You believe in yourself ? do you believe your efforts are worth existing ? Because if You do not believe, even the biggest efforts can be in vain. Faith can open up many doors for each of us, it´s not the solution for problems but it is part of the solution
     
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  11. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Thanks - sorry. Just haven't been well today.
     
  12. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    Please, You don´t have to be sorry, I understand You
    Just hope You will rise up and that your efforts will lead You towards freedom from all the bad that You´ve been carrying within

    Do not give up, your life, your wellness and your happiness matter !!!
     
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  13. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

    Trying to stay strong.
     
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  14. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    May U succeed !!!!!!!!
     
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  15. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

  16. Lightwarrior

    Lightwarrior SF Social Media

    No need to thank me, if You ever wanna talk. Message me and We could try to help You together .
     
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  17. brknsilence

    brknsilence Well-Known Member

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