Give yourself a chance...I highly recommend reading.... Healing the Shame that Binds You, by John Bradshaw It's available on Amazon...used copies are under $10 This book WILL shed light on the SOURCE of your inner turmoil. Another pathway to discovery and healing is thru the 12 Step ACA program. http://www.12stepforums.net/acoa.html I attend a weekly ACA meeting in the Seattle area. The yellow ACA workbook provides a structured approach to self-discovery and healing. http://www.adultchildren.org/lit/Handbook.s I am working on finding my way out of the depths of despair after losing my career, family, home, and savings. One thing I do know for sure...for me, it requires resources and help....I can not do it all alone. I hope this helps at least one other person find that there ARE answers.