Being constantly accused of taking drugs

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Petal, Dec 18, 2014.

  1. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    My mom is constantly accusing me of taking drugs, so much that I have asked the doctor to drug test me at least 10 times in the past few months and of course they all came back just showing benzodiazepines which I am prescribed and sometimes opiates also prescribed. I hate drugs, I've seen what they do to people I would never go down that road. Just because I was a bit drowsy from taking zyprexa last night and happy 'cos I had fun with my friend, she said I was on drugs, I said oh god do we have to ''do this again like really? you seriously want another drugs test''.

    It puts me down, leaves me feeling not trusted even though I've proved time and time again with charity work , the drug tests etc...that i'm a responsible adult. My moods change fast, rapidly sometimes and she's mixing up mental illness with drugs. It makes me feel; like crap, any advice?
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 18, 2014
  2. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    What drugs does she think you are on? If she thinks you are abusing benzos or taking something opiate based (even maybe extra pain killers from somewhere because you are in so much pain all the time) then I guess I can see why she wouldn't necessarily think that a drug test proves anything. Maybe you need to sit her down and have a proper conversation with her - ask her what she thinks you are taking and why she thinks that so you can at least understand what is causing her concern.

    Have you taken her to see the doctor with you so she can understand the different medications you are on and the effects of these? That is another thing that might set her mind at ease - I can see that it might be confusing for someone who doesn't fully understand all the different types of meds you are taking.

    Without understanding why she thinks you are taking drugs, it is hard to give you any advice on how to deal with it. I am sorry it is making you feel bad :hug:
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Thank you for the kind and understanding reply hun. She thinks I'm smoking weed and taking extra painkillers, I do take extra painkillers prescribed by my doctor, she allows it for when the pain is really bad.

    My mom knows about all my medications because she googles them all every single one. She hates me being on lyrica because I walk like I'm drunk sometimes on it. While she knows a lot about psych meds, she knows very little about painkillers, she thinks you can get high from paracetamol. I was taking it for tooth ache and she said i was taking it to get high...i was like you cannot get high even if you tried from this. She just won't listen.

    She often thinks I'm taking meds given to me by friends (which im not). Constantly accusing me of smoking weed because I'm drowsy. I tried explaining to her that if I had smoked weed it would have shown up in the drug tests, but noooooo she won't listen. She picks and chooses what she wants to believe.

    To sit down and talk with her? I have on numerous occasionally she just doesn't listen and doesn't believe me even with the proof of drug tests.
  4. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    Okay - maybe you just need to be a little bit firm with her? That you are a grown adult in your mid twenties and you are taking the regular advice of a doctor - that since your home is not prison, you will not be taking any more drug tests and you will not be discussing the topic again. So she can choose to trust you or not, but you are done discussing it with her. If the drug tests make no difference anyway there isn't any point in continuing with them if it makes you feel crappy and resolves nothing.

    If her issue is that she dislikes the drugs that you have been prescribed then I do not see that you have any option but to tell her gently but firmly that she needs to accept it - the doctor has prescribed those medications and deemed them required for your health. I really do think at this point the only thing to do is to assert yourself in this situation.
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Thanks again...yeah the many drugs tests throughout the year have made no difference. I am going to take your advice, I realize there is zero point in doing another drug test so I'm just going to say no this has got to stop, I will try and be firm and see how it goes, I did get frustrated today and wasn't sure how to approach it which is why I wrote it here. Thank you for the advice and kindness x
  6. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Agree what Freya said, hope it goes well for you. It's never pleasant when a loved one keeps accusing one of something they did not do.
  7. Zaheer

    Zaheer Account Closed

  8. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    Ah, that's always fun. People accusing you of doing drugs when you're not. I don't know about you, since you've never really been ''addicted'' (I assume) to anything in the past, except maybe physically to the things you were prescribed, but when an actual drug addict is trying to stop using and staying clean and people are accusing them of still being high it makes you A.) want to snap their neck cause you're in withdrawal and you wish you were high instead B.) want to go and get high even more since they doubt you anyway. On the one hand, yes, I get why I wasn't trusted for a while, since I stole thousands of dollars from my family to feed my addiction, but on the other hand, I wanted to snap because I was on my second day of cold turkey heroin withdrawal, my body was in all sorts of physical pain, I was restless as hell, nauseous, freezing my ass off under the blankets, and my mom thought I was high because I was closing my eyes trying to sleep it off. Very frustrating to say the least.

    Well, for one, I would tell her that if you had weed in your system it would definitely show up on a drug test because it stays in there anywhere from 15-45 days. And there would be nothing you could do to fake a clean test with that, either. If she doesn't believe you tell her to look it up. As for the opiates, well, there's not much you can really do about her thinking that aside from having her give them to you herself when you need them, but that would be pretty degrading to you since you're an adult and shouldn't have to do that. You could also try to explain what someone who is actually high on opiates would look like, but that might backfire against you like it did for me that one time...Some people just don't get it though because they've never had an addiction to anything themselves, or they're just ignorant and set in their ways. And by the way, you're not alone in the fact that your mom thinks Tylenol is addictive. I sometimes have to take ibuprofen for when my stomach thinks I have Crohn's but I wont be diagnosed until I have my colonoscopy next month so for now I just have to make do and deal with it however I can. My mom freaked when she found out I was taking ibuprofen though, saying it was addictive. That I'd put any drug in my body just to self medicate. I didn't even bother saying anything to that, cause it's useless. I just let her think whatever she wants to think at times like that.