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Being kicked when you're already down

#1
I talked to a gp today. Not my own one.. they don't seem to let us have access to the ones we actually know anymore (at my gp surgery anyway). She was very nice and gave me a long telephone appointment, which I really appreciated. However, we got around to discussing mental health support, and I said I'd had an initial phone call from the resource centre in June, to say I was "known" to them now, so I could call if things got really bad. I can't say I really trust them so I never used that bit. However I had said that what I really need is help for my complex ptsd. I was told that there is a service for that (which nobody has ever mentioned in my 20 years of on and off trying to access my local nhs mental health services. The person I spoke with on the phone said they'd be having a team meeting the following week to review all the cases so they'd put that to the team then.

I haven't heard anything since, so the gp looked on the system today and apparently they sent a letter to them to say that in their opinion any intervention on mental health's part would not only not help but may make me worse, therefore they're not going to offer me any help at all!!

At that point I burst into tears and told the gp that I honestly wasn't surprised as it's not the first time they've washed their hands of me.

But to do it without even having the courtesy to phone me or send me out a letter, leaving me waiting for months to know if I'm on any waiting list is unnecessarily cruel. I know they don't like me there because cbt doesn't work for me (due to not having any "inner" voice to affect my actions, which is kind of a big part of cbt), and when it repeatedly didn't work, I was labelled uncooperative.

They are so damn petty and vindictive in this city. All the resource centres I've been to over the years have been exactly with the same, with the same *swear word* staff that only let the "right" kind of people get support.

They never even bothered to have a single phone appointment other than that initial "you are known to us" call. I haven't talked to any of them in 2 years, yet they don't want to know.

This is nhs mental health. Isn't it supposed to be for everyone?? To say I'm upset is an understatement. I've always felt like there's nowhere to turn for a long time now, but to have definitive proof that actually there definitely is nowhere.. I mean really.. what can you say when things are beyond bad, and the people you're meant to be able to turn to have shut the door without even bothering to let you know?

I've spent so long trying to find alternative help because I know how god awful they are, but I always told myself if everything else fails, at least that's a last chance safety net. But there's not. There's nothing. There's just nothing.
 
#2
Sorry that this happened.
apparently they sent a letter to them to say that in their opinion any intervention on mental health's part would not only not help but may make me worse, therefore they're not going to offer me any help at all!!
I only know about the NHS from what people have told me, but it seems like one of the problems is that the NHS is supposed to do a lot, but they have limited funding, and maybe some people working for them who are less than dedicated to providing healthcare. They can't really say outright "We're lazy and cheap, so we're just not going to give some people adequate healthcare", because it would be a political problem. So instead, they come up with an excuse as to why they won't provide you with help, and then don't tell you that they're not going to try to give you help because they just want the issue to go away and not be noticed.
 

Lady Wolfshead

"Don't fear mistakes. There are none." Miles Davis
#3
*console *hug *console *hug
I know what you are going through because my best friend lived in Brighton on disability, had DID and went through the same things. He also kept telling them he was physically ill and they ignored him until his repeated visits to hospital finally got him diagnosed with a severe physical illness. Sadly it was too late and he died. Early treatment might have saved him.

Also, he had been on a waitlist for at least two years for EMDR treatment for his PTSD. He really felt that it was helping, but sadly he died before he could complete it.

Now that you know there is a treatment out there for your PTSD, YOU CAN GET THAT TREATMENT. You just have to remain calm and navigate the bureaucracy. Keep contacting them and asking them questions about why you were turned down, and look online to find reasons the PTSD treatment will work for you. Convince them to give it to you. Make yourself such a nuisance (but polite) that they will give it to you just so they don't have to deal with you.

Honestly. I work in a big bureaucracy and the way to get help is to be patient, persistent and ask for the next person up, and you will eventually get someone who can make a decision. Remember that each person you talk to on the phone is *potentially* an ally, so try not to alienate too many people. You will eventually get someone like me who is willing to explain the chain of command to you, and what you have to do to get help. Right now I think your mindset may be that they are your enemies, and they are not.

You can do it! *hug
 
#4
@may71 It seems to be like one giant power trip in the resource centres. They don't like if you happen to know more about your own thought process than them. I mean, I've known myself for 43 years. Mental health system is unfortunately seperate from the GP system. The GPs are nice but they can only refer me back to the atrocious mental health system.

@Lady Wolfshead I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. It's completely unsurprising, but still so very sad all the same. It happens way too often.

I've basically burned my bridges by going through the complaints procedure over the terrible lack of care I've received in the past. They've pretty much black listed me because of that. They don't even try to hide their hostility. It's just shocking really. I've been told I'm uncooperative and don't engage, yet every other place I've been, from rape crisis, to the Samaritans, to private counselling all told me that it wasn't true in the slightest.

I've out right been asked why I haven't killed myself yet, 2 days after a serious attempt. I've had cpns disappear off the face of the planet and judged over it, even though it turned out this person was doing the same to lots of her clients and was eventually struck off the nurse's register 6 years later.

But they still treat me like I'm the problem. They're the keepers of the keys. They decide at the team meetings who gets help and who doesn't.

I'm told that because if my aspergers, that I'm "complicated", as if that's a good reason why I'm not a good fit for them. There's been so many things since the year 2000. Too many. I can't honestly say I've had a single good experience from them in the 20 years since my life fell apart.
 
#5
I think there is a service called PALS, which is something like, "Patient Advocacy and Liaison Service". They may be able to help straighten things out with them.

You might also want to try acupuncture for PTSD. I think there was a pilot study that indicated it worked just as well as therapy.

I can tell you about how to find a clinic if you're interested.
 
#6
@may71 I don't think I have the heart to fight the mental health service anymore. I tried going through the whole system, got my mp involved, but in the end.. nothing actually happens. I can't put myself through months of that again. I had way more fight before they broke me.

I'm not sure about acupuncture. I definitely wouldn't think about it until the pandemic stuff was over. I haven't left the house in 5 months. I wonder if acupressure works too. I know acupuncture needles are tiny but they still worry me.

Thanks for the input though. I used to have a lot of fight in me to challenge the system and fight for what's right, but I've come to realise that there's too many of them and not enough of me to make the slightest bit of difference.
 

Lady Wolfshead

"Don't fear mistakes. There are none." Miles Davis
#8
I understand that you feel like you can't fight anymore, and that they are hostile. I think you are personalizing it too much. They are just doing a job and I think it's possible for you to get treatment However, I do get if you feel like you can't pursue it right now.
 
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Lara_C

Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#9
Thanks for the input though. I used to have a lot of fight in me to challenge the system and fight for what's right, but I've come to realise that there's too many of them and not enough of me to make the slightest bit of difference.
It's no wonder you are so frustrated Violet. The NHS has been deliberately underfunded, with many services at breaking point. The most vulnerable are suffering everywhere unnecessarily from what is fundamentally a political issue. The only way things will change is by people joining together to demand it because one day they or their loved ones could be in the most vulnerable groups. You are a highly intelligent, articulate, and experienced woman and I feels these gifts are greatly needed to tackle the many problems we face in todays world. Have you thought of joining a campaign group or political party to fight for change alongside others who share your goals and similar experiences as your own? There's strength in shared purpose and meaning in following an important goal plus the sense of connectedness to something bigger than yourself without which we all feel alone.
 
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#10
I understand that you feel like you can't fight anymore, and that they are hostile. I think you are personalizing it too much. They are just doing a job and I think it's possible for you to get treatment However, I do get if you feel like you can't pursue it right now.
Honestly Lady, they act like it's personal. Like they're one big team and you've stepped on too many toes so now they're going to punish you. I believe there are things written in my notes about me. I have requested seeing my notes in the past, which I have a legal right to see, but I was never shown a copy. Again, it's not a surprise in the slightest.

The next bit isn't pointed at you, I just really need to vent at the atrocious bs I've experienced over 2 decades.

It's like an old boys club (ironic that most are women). There's very much an ingrained and corrupt banding together culture at the heart of the mental health services in my city. I didn't believe that for the first year, nor the 5th. But by the 10th or 15th, the pattern was sadly very obvious. The staff are so completely institutionalised. They very much treat people here as paperwork to be shuffled from one end of the desk to the other, with seemingly no awareness that we're real human beings, and even less focus on getting people better.

My mum used to question whether I was taking things the wrong way until the day I asked her to come to an appointment with me. Her words afterwords were something like "we were just supposed to sit there and be lectured. We weren't allowed to say anything!", which is pretty much it. Maybe in other cities, the client gets to have an input, but here, you're told how you're feeling, and when you say actually that's not how I feel, you're seen as being problematic.

It's one thing to step in line, play their game for an end result, but not when the treatment is completely inappropriate for the condition. I have complex ptsd. Telling me to listen to music or go for a walk (at 2am, alone!) isn't the answer. There's a reason trauma based therapy exists, only I can't access it. I saw a nice lady privately that understood both my issues, and the reason why I've been hitting my head against a brick wall with nhs services for so long. Sadly, the money didn't last long enough to get past the initial stages of getting safety mechanisms in place for doing the core trauma work.

A large problem is that nobody even listens when I tell them that I have no inner voice, no ability to visualise, or see pictures in my head. Apparently it's called aphantasia. It angers me that I've gone through the bs mental health system for 20 years yet only heard about this randomly from google this year. There's a Facebook post by Blake Ross that describes it better than I ever could, but it's very much the reason that cbt does not, and never will work for me. I've told them so many times that I need a different kind of therapy but it's the only one they've ever been willing to offer me.

I can't begin to describe just how completely broken they left me, for a very long time. I believed for a decade that I was the problem. As they put it to me.. lots of other people get better with cbt, why not you? I thought I must be doing something wrong every time we got to the end of 8 sessions of cbt and I felt exactly the same as at the start. Whenever that happened, it was heavily implied that maybe I just hadn't tried hard enough or engaged enough.. But I went to every appointment, and filled in every pointless mood diary requested. I say pointless because during those years I was practically house bound. My activities consisted of either watching tv or playing video games for pretty much all day, every day. I'm not really sure there's much to say about how those things made me feel. They got me from one end of the day to the point of bedtime, when I got to not have to be awake again. Nothing more. I was living in what was essentially a prison for 15 years. There was no joy. No spark. I felt like a lifer with no hope for parole, and no visitors.
It was only when I walked away from that whole institutionalised monstrosity that I realised I was still a human being, and that my feelings were actually real and valid, and not simply excuses. It took probably 10 years to heal from the psychological and systematic abuse I suffered from the doctors that are supposed to do no harm.

I never wanted to ever have to go back. I told myself that it's been years. That the failings of a large section of mental health care across the UK has been given the spotlight. That for example the inappropriate care of a great number of autistic people has made headlines, so maybe that forced some long needed reforms. I tried to believe that maybe things had changed, but as always.. my faith is sadly misplaced. Maybe it's a blessing that the door is firmly shut. The disastrous dealings with the crisis team in 2018 very nearly killed me. I'm not so sure I'd survive another similar situation again.

I know the reality, but it's a hard one to face. There is no help out there for me unless I pay for it privately. That's just not possible financially for me. My choices realistically are either I live with the fact that I'll never get any actual help with my mental health issues, or I accept the fact that deep down, the prospect of having to live with this pain that knaws at me in every waking hour is just not one that I wish to endure. I don't want to live with the loss of my entire family. I don't want to live with the memories of the abuse I went through, and I definitely don't want to live with the knowledge that this right now is probably as good as it's ever going to get.

I battled for 2 decades. This year was the big 20 since it all fell apart and I lost absolutely everything. I never recovered, and after the memory veil lifted 2 years ago, bringing the true horror into sharp focus, I'm 99% sure I never will.
 
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MisterBGone

Well-Known Member
#11
Honestly Lady, they act like it's personal. Like they're one big team and you've stepped on too many toes so now they're going to punish you. I believe there are things written in my notes about me. I have requested seeing my notes in the past, which I have a legal right to see, but I was never shown a copy. Again, it's not a surprise in the slightest.

The next bit isn't pointed at you, I just really need to vent at the atrocious bs I've experienced over 2 decades.

It's like an old boys club (ironic that most are women). There's very much an ingrained and corrupt banding together culture at the heart of the mental health services in my city. I didn't believe that for the first year, nor the 5th. But by the 10th or 15th, the pattern was sadly very obvious. The staff are so completely institutionalised. They very much treat people here as paperwork to be shuffled from one end of the desk to the other, with seemingly no awareness that we're real human beings, and even less focus on getting people better.

My mum used to question whether I was taking things the wrong way until the day I asked her to come to an appointment with me. Her words afterwords were something like "we were just supposed to sit there and be lectured. We weren't allowed to say anything!", which is pretty much it. Maybe in other cities, the client gets to have an input, but here, you're told how you're feeling, and when you say actually that's not how I feel, you're seen as being problematic.

It's one thing to step in line, play their game for an end result, but not when the treatment is completely inappropriate for the condition. I have complex ptsd. Telling me to listen to music or go for a walk (at 2am, alone!) isn't the answer. There's a reason trauma based therapy exists, only I can't access it. I saw a nice lady privately that understood both my issues, and the reason why I've been hitting my head against a brick wall with nhs services for so long. Sadly, the money didn't last long enough to get past the initial stages of getting safety mechanisms in place for doing the core trauma work.

A large problem is that nobody even listens when I tell them that I have no inner voice, no ability to visualise, or see pictures in my head. Apparently it's called aphantasia. It angers me that I've gone through the bs mental health system for 20 years yet only heard about this randomly from google this year. There's a Facebook post by Blake Ross that describes it better than I ever could, but it's very much the reason that cbt does not, and never will work for me. I've told them so many times that I need a different kind of therapy but it's the only one they've ever been willing to offer me.

I can't begin to describe just how completely broken they left me, for a very long time. I believed for a decade that I was the problem. As they put it to me.. lots of other people get better with cbt, why not you? I thought I must be doing something wrong every time we got to the end of 8 sessions of cbt and I felt exactly the same as at the start. Whenever that happened, it was heavily implied that maybe I just hadn't tried hard enough or engaged enough.. But I went to every appointment, and filled in every pointless mood diary requested. I say pointless because during those years I was practically house bound. My activities consisted of either watching tv or playing video games for pretty much all day, every day. I'm not really sure there's much to say about how those things made me feel. They got me from one end of the day to the point of bedtime, when I got to not have to be awake again. Nothing more. I was living in what was essentially a prison for 15 years. There was no joy. No spark. I felt like a lifer with no hope for parole, and no visitors.
It was only when I walked away from that whole institutionalised monstrosity that I realised I was still a human being, and that my feelings were actually real and valid, and not simply excuses. It took probably 10 years to heal from the psychological and systematic abuse I suffered from the doctors that are supposed to do no harm.

I never wanted to ever have to go back. I told myself that it's been years. That the failings of a large section of mental health care across the UK has been given the spotlight. That for example the inappropriate care of a great number of autistic people has made headlines, so maybe that forced some long needed reforms. I tried to believe that maybe things had changed, but as always.. my faith is sadly misplaced. Maybe it's a blessing that the door is firmly shut. The disastrous dealings with the crisis team in 2018 very nearly killed me. I'm not so sure I'd survive another similar situation again.

I know the reality, but it's a hard one to face. There is no help out there for me unless I pay for it privately. That's just not possible financially for me. My choices realistically are either I live with the fact that I'll never get any actual help with my mental health issues, or I accept the fact that deep down, the prospect of having to live with this pain that knaws at me in every waking hour is just not one that I wish to endure. I don't want to live with the loss of my entire family. I don't want to live with the memories of the abuse I went through, and I definitely don't want to live with the knowledge that this right now is probably as good as it's ever going to get.

I battled for 2 decades. This year was the big 20 since it all fell apart and I lost absolutely everything. I never recovered, and after the memory veil lifted 2 years ago, bringing the true horror into sharp focus, I'm 99% sure I never will.
God Violet! . . (That sounds like Hell!)—
 

Alone04

Well-Known Member
#12
I talked to a gp today. Not my own one.. they don't seem to let us have access to the ones we actually know anymore (at my gp surgery anyway). She was very nice and gave me a long telephone appointment, which I really appreciated. However, we got around to discussing mental health support, and I said I'd had an initial phone call from the resource centre in June, to say I was "known" to them now, so I could call if things got really bad. I can't say I really trust them so I never used that bit. However I had said that what I really need is help for my complex ptsd. I was told that there is a service for that (which nobody has ever mentioned in my 20 years of on and off trying to access my local nhs mental health services. The person I spoke with on the phone said they'd be having a team meeting the following week to review all the cases so they'd put that to the team then.

I haven't heard anything since, so the gp looked on the system today and apparently they sent a letter to them to say that in their opinion any intervention on mental health's part would not only not help but may make me worse, therefore they're not going to offer me any help at all!!

At that point I burst into tears and told the gp that I honestly wasn't surprised as it's not the first time they've washed their hands of me.

But to do it without even having the courtesy to phone me or send me out a letter, leaving me waiting for months to know if I'm on any waiting list is unnecessarily cruel. I know they don't like me there because cbt doesn't work for me (due to not having any "inner" voice to affect my actions, which is kind of a big part of cbt), and when it repeatedly didn't work, I was labelled uncooperative.

They are so damn petty and vindictive in this city. All the resource centres I've been to over the years have been exactly with the same, with the same *swear word* staff that only let the "right" kind of people get support.

They never even bothered to have a single phone appointment other than that initial "you are known to us" call. I haven't talked to any of them in 2 years, yet they don't want to know.

This is nhs mental health. Isn't it supposed to be for everyone?? To say I'm upset is an understatement. I've always felt like there's nowhere to turn for a long time now, but to have definitive proof that actually there definitely is nowhere.. I mean really.. what can you say when things are beyond bad, and the people you're meant to be able to turn to have shut the door without even bothering to let you know?

I've spent so long trying to find alternative help because I know how god awful they are, but I always told myself if everything else fails, at least that's a last chance safety net. But there's not. There's nothing. There's just nothing.
This all sucks. I hope you can find help somewhere cause reading this just depresses the hell out of me. What do they expect you to do???
 

LonelyHiker

Waitering for Godot
#13
@VioletDawn

I'm sorry you've been treated so poorly by the mental health services in your city. You deserve to be treated with compassion and understanding - unfortunately, these qualities are as rare as hen's teeth in the medical field (cabal) these days.

I share your disappointment and cynicism. I gave up on the so-called (ineffectual) doctors, therapists and medications years ago. I've probably gotten more benefit and healing from hiking (and spending time in the outdoors in general), mindful practice, diet and natural supplements than all the crap therapy and pills combined. I wish I could get a refund for all the $$$ I wasted on it.*

So yeah, I get you...I hope you find something that works for you and that you get the relief you deserve.

*Caveat - I know therapy and meds have helped others. If it works for you, great..it didn't for me. This post is an opinion only, and certainly not meant to discourage people who are suffering from seeking help.

That said, I will say that healthcare (and insurance) should NOT be business commodities..
 

UKDude

Well-Known Member
#15
This year was the big 20 since it all fell apart and I lost absolutely everything. I never recovered, and after the memory veil lifted 2 years ago, bringing the true horror into sharp focus, I'm 99% sure I never will.
Sorry you're having such a bad experience, I can't make up my mind whether the NHS are so underfunded that they will only see people who kick up the biggest fuss, since they must be the ones most in need of help (which isn't true of course), or some of them are so useless at their jobs the system is fundamentally broken - but it IS like an old boys club, once you're in you'd have to do something pretty serious to ever lose your job.

It makes my blood boil to see senior NHS people get made redundant and paid out huge (£1oo's of thousands) amounts of money, then 6 weeks later they're being employed by the NHS as "consultants", doing the samething they did in their job, but for a lot more money.

Anyway, the bit of your post I've quoted really stood out to me because that's kind of what I experienced, it was like I'd been walking around in a blurry foggy misty world, and when I kind of woke up everything came into super sharp focus and I turned into a quivering wreck at the enormity of the situation I'm really in. Hence why I'm here.

I hope you get the help you deserve, it's not right or fair the way you're being treated.
 

Lady Wolfshead

"Don't fear mistakes. There are none." Miles Davis
#16
Wow. That's horrible. I do remember that my friend had a mental health worker who was supposed to visit him every few weeks. And since my friend had no family, and no friends within 3 hours away, he really looked forward to those visits and (as he became more physically debilitated) needed help to do things like take his garbage bags up the hill. And the guy would show up to maybe 1 out of 10 appointments, sometimes texting to say he wouldn't make it and sometimes not. And my friend had complained and was not believed. He would get all perky thinking this guy was coming, and I would just know the guy wasn't going to show up. Seriously among our friends online it was like a joke that the guy never showed. If only he had known he was depriving a dying man.
 

Alone04

Well-Known Member
#17
Wow. That's horrible. I do remember that my friend had a mental health worker who was supposed to visit him every few weeks. And since my friend had no family, and no friends within 3 hours away, he really looked forward to those visits and (as he became more physically debilitated) needed help to do things like take his garbage bags up the hill. And the guy would show up to maybe 1 out of 10 appointments, sometimes texting to say he wouldn't make it and sometimes not. And my friend had complained and was not believed. He would get all perky thinking this guy was coming, and I would just know the guy wasn't going to show up. Seriously among our friends online it was like a joke that the guy never showed. If only he had known he was depriving a dying man.
And he probably still had his job. Unbelievable
 
#19
Thank you everyone for the replies. You've no idea how much it means to me to be heard, and believed, and to be allowed to have a massive rant.. that had been boiling away inside for some time. It felt really good to let it all out in one go.

My local mental health system is so broken that even good meaning attempts to improve it just get lost in a mess of red tape and multi layers of managerial barriers. Now that my emotions are starting to settle, common sense is telling me that going back to all that would be beyond madness.

I wish the system was better, but it is what it is. I'm scared to admit to myself that I actually have nowhere to turn for mental health support, but it's the truth.

@Lady Wolfshead, I completely understand what you wrote about your friend looking forward to the visits only to be completely crushed when they never bothered to show up. I wonder if the people letting us down knew just how much of a lifeline these appointments are, if they would act as badly. After my experiences, I probably suspect that it wouldn't make much difference.

There have been a few good people along the way, but sadly not enough. Many of them are ex nhs as they felt that they couldn't make a difference while working in those roles. It says something when therapists have to leave the health service in order to help people.

Walking away was the best decision, but the fear and desperation when it's 2am and the bad times hit is so hard when you know there's nobody to call. The Samaritans are fantastic and have been a literal life saver on more than a few occasions, but I can't and won't over use the service. I'm only one of a huge number of people that need their help.

For 6 years, figure skating has been my therapy. It gave me a sense of purpose and validation again. For an hour or two, I felt free. But the rinks are still closed in Scotland. It's been 5 months and counting. I got a pair of off ice figure skates and had hoped to use my miniscule life savings to get my back garden paved so I could practise. If I end up with a surface I can skate on, it will be worth it. If not, I'll be no further forward but flat broke.

It's a waiting game though. Building materials are still quite scarce at suppliers, and it's taken months to find anyone that I can even remotely afford. I desperately need this to work but the costs just keep increasing. It's 50/50 right now whether it's going to be possible.

I have to keep hoping that something works out. Hope these days is so fleeting and delicate. I have so many moments where I want to sink into the darkness and let it take me, but I'm trying to hold on. Trying to tell myself that it's going to be ok, somehow. I'm scared. Terrified actually, but all I can do is keep trying.
 

Waves

Well-Known Member
#20
I talked to a gp today. Not my own one.. they don't seem to let us have access to the ones we actually know anymore (at my gp surgery anyway). She was very nice and gave me a long telephone appointment, which I really appreciated. However, we got around to discussing mental health support, and I said I'd had an initial phone call from the resource centre in June, to say I was "known" to them now, so I could call if things got really bad. I can't say I really trust them so I never used that bit. However I had said that what I really need is help for my complex ptsd. I was told that there is a service for that (which nobody has ever mentioned in my 20 years of on and off trying to access my local nhs mental health services. The person I spoke with on the phone said they'd be having a team meeting the following week to review all the cases so they'd put that to the team then.

I haven't heard anything since, so the gp looked on the system today and apparently they sent a letter to them to say that in their opinion any intervention on mental health's part would not only not help but may make me worse, therefore they're not going to offer me any help at all!!

At that point I burst into tears and told the gp that I honestly wasn't surprised as it's not the first time they've washed their hands of me.

But to do it without even having the courtesy to phone me or send me out a letter, leaving me waiting for months to know if I'm on any waiting list is unnecessarily cruel. I know they don't like me there because cbt doesn't work for me (due to not having any "inner" voice to affect my actions, which is kind of a big part of cbt), and when it repeatedly didn't work, I was labelled uncooperative.

They are so damn petty and vindictive in this city. All the resource centres I've been to over the years have been exactly with the same, with the same *swear word* staff that only let the "right" kind of people get support.

They never even bothered to have a single phone appointment other than that initial "you are known to us" call. I haven't talked to any of them in 2 years, yet they don't want to know.

This is nhs mental health. Isn't it supposed to be for everyone?? To say I'm upset is an understatement. I've always felt like there's nowhere to turn for a long time now, but to have definitive proof that actually there definitely is nowhere.. I mean really.. what can you say when things are beyond bad, and the people you're meant to be able to turn to have shut the door without even bothering to let you know?

I've spent so long trying to find alternative help because I know how god awful they are, but I always told myself if everything else fails, at least that's a last chance safety net. But there's not. There's nothing. There's just nothing.
Can you talk here for support??
 

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