Heya, sorry I aint been on for a while, since Ive been back, Ive just been finding it really hard, to be sober and clean. I havent selfharmed in about 6 weeks which is good, but ive been getting the urges to do it, and also to overdose, although if i do i will lose my gaf, as im in a half way house, and also i will get put back in a mental hospital again and i dont want that. Im just finding stuff hard, and i need help, I just cant ask. Its false pride I know but im just finding it hard. I thought it wouldnt be this painful. Im getting rejected from jobs becuase of my mental health and also because Ive been in rehab for 8 months, so i just dont know if its just easier to get drunk and forget everything. Sorry for the rant, dont really have the right to as I havent been on for ages, but i just need 2 get it out.