no, i think you should take yourself to hospital and tell them, they will help to keep you safe, or at least see your doc urgently. i have been in same boat, as i am sure has everyone on this forum, but you need to take steps to keep yourself safe, NO ONE here will agree what you suggest or give you permission, but will try to help you stay safe with as much support as can be offered. obviously something is making you feel this way and so you need to seek professional help NOW.
please stay safe and seek help either here or with doc/hospital :hugtackles:
a lot of people survive jumping in front of a train, heavily wounded, losing limbs but still live.
I'm sure you don't want to live like that, it would make things even worse. Try to get some help talk to people you know or doctors, ...or just posting here if it helps a bit.
Think of the train driver - you would be putting him or her in a position whereby they might have a death on their conscience. Does not matter if you jumped - and there is no blame for the driver - he or she might well feel it anyway.
That's if you do actually die. Many I'm sure, might wish that afterwards due to the horrific injuries. Depression by itself can be beaten. It is plain sailing compared to someone who had depression, tried suicide, and ended up with extra added value depression due to physical disabilities that limited or ended various social contact.
There are worse things than depression. Some pain can literally wipe out depression. However, long tern pain just makes it difficult to deal with.
You are suffering from depression on the high end of the scale. My advice, you ought to see your doctor - you can book tonight (phone your local surgery, many have a phone appointment system were you can book the appointment by phone. It's an automatic system.
Last but not least - what has driven you to this drastic solution?
Or is this the kind of depression which has no reason - just the gradual progress from 'I don't feel good' to 'I want to die'?
Okay, first of all, as asked by peacelovingguy, what's so painful that it's making you want to kill yourself?
Second, even if you manage to line yourself up perfectly with the rails, boy are you going to be surprised how scary it is to hear the tracks rumble and rattle louder and louder as the train gets closer. Trust me on that one, getting run over by a train was my method of choice with my second go-around with suicide. Besides, trains stop pretty fast when the emergency brake is activated.
Third, why Friday? What's so special about Friday? Most people pick Monday.