Ben Franklin?

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by Esmeralda, Apr 27, 2008.

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  1. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Saw this yesterday on the internet and was wondering if anyone else had read it. Sounds very strange...


    What do you think about the new scientific evidence that found Ben Franklin's DNA (in the form of semen) in no fewer than 7 of his former slaves remaining rectal tissue? Scientists speculate that he anally raped them in order to prevent pregnancy.



    I read it in the New York Daily Chronicle about a week ago. The article was about a woman who wanted her D.N.A. matched against the D.N.A. of the former slaves of Benjamin Franklin because she was under the impression that her slave ancestors (property of Franklin's) reproduced with him. When they exhumed the bodies of his former slaves, they found no D.N.A. evidence to support her claim (backed by the Rainbow-Push coalition and the N.A.A.C.P.), but they found seminal fluid in their rectal tissue that was an exact match to Franklin's D.N.A.

    They also had an interview with the scientists and also a Psychology prof. from Stanford or something.
     
  2. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    Interesting method of contraception! It is surely healthier than hormone pills. Perhaps it should be reintroduced into common practice and taught in all american schools as "the original founding fathers' method" or "the pure american way"!

    Back to the tradition!!!!

    :Jumpy::massmoon::unclesmil::clap::idea::lolabove::rofl::eek:ld::patriot::party:
     
  3. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    :dog::patriot:
     
  4. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    I read that BF was researching lightnings. It seems he was also interested in static electricity (the one caused by rubbing things) :idea:
     
  5. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    ...WHAT :blink:?!
    But doesn't that mean he did it with them just before they died? H.S. wtf!
     
  6. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Holy shit, I didn't think about it that way...ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww
     
  7. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

     
  8. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE REVISED

    We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Anal Satisfaction.

    ...and the star spangled buttocks in triumph shall sway
    O'er the land of the free and the home of the gay!:Jumpy:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRrrywX5uJc

    Ps:Sorry, Americans, no hate speech intended, It's just soooooo funnny :biggrin:
     
  9. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    Funniest... thread... EVER XD
     
  10. Right U R Ken

    Right U R Ken Well-Known Member

    Don't believe everything you read on the internet. Or see in a FOX special.
     
  11. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    But I want so badly for it to be true...
     
  12. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    Whattt??? A woman who is keen about buttsex??? Oh, my princess, where have you been 8 years ago when I was, younger, stronger and not yet depressed to the point of frigidity :cry2:
     
  13. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Hehe, as long as I'm not the one receiving the buttsex, I think it's pretty damn funny :)
     
  14. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    That means Benjamin Franklin was a noble gentleman with high moral standards who would never dump his old sex-slave woman because of a younger one. He rather simultaneously "analyzed" them all till the very day death did them part. Now, I simply cannot stress enogh how much modern decadent America, loose of all healthy traditional values, needs such shining examples of masculine power, endurance and fidelity. Never let the flag touch the ground, Benjamin Franklin! :patriot:
     
  15. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Perhaps it was even post-mortem?
     
  16. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    I don't know if I believe this I have to see the evidence for it myself. Everyone knows Franklin was horny but they say he usually kept his horn on the path of righteousness...
     
  17. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    It seems he liked tho choose "the path less traveled". True pioneer spirit!:canadian:
     
  18. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    unrelated sorry but can someone please go to my 'when's the last time...' thread I feel like it's a good topic but no one's going along with it. And if someone would type 'analyzed somone' there i would be really honored lol
     
  19. lifeisashedog

    lifeisashedog Well-Known Member

    School psychologist once tried to analyze me, but it was such a traumatic experience for her, she never tried that again.:biggrin:

    Where exactly is "when's the last time..." thread?
     
  20. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    I guess if the people were already dead then at least he wouldn't be a rapist.:unsure::patriot::unclesmil It's actually very romantic when you think about it, a man so in love with slaves and buttsex that he continued to violate human property even in death.
     
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