Benzos.. anyone else having a hard time?

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Smashed__, May 13, 2011.

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  1. Smashed__

    Smashed__ Well-Known Member

    ill keep this short as most dont reply.

    Im an addict now, severely and quickly within months going on .5mg of klonopin twice a day to up to 10mg a day some days. then drop to zero for a weekend as i can bare it to save pills since my script maxed out at 4mg a day, and a controlled fill date.

    the drops cause me to now be labeled as seizure prone and im finding that i think its causing the break downs weekly. im taking meds daily now as i counted and can make it to my fill date but im unsure what i do.

    I NEED them to function, to help with the paranoia part of my social anxiety. i cannot back track. will not. now with no pot and lamictal im just confused and back to shorter dfuse with people. any stories or advice? ativan was suggested by someone i thought was a friend.. heroin addict.
     
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I think that it might be worthwhile to tell your doctor about your addiction

    I recommend that you start doing a daily rigorous meditation practice. clearing your mind completely for an hour each day. you'd think that doing something like that would be easy, but it's actually really tough.

    I found that dietary changes were helpful. I've been trying to follow traditional chinese dietary therapy. fresh, cooked, whole foods served warm. avoiding processed foods and chemical additives especially, cold foods, raw foods

    getting a 1/2 hour of gentle low impact aerobic exercise everyday can help. just enough to break a very slight sweat

    acupuncture and chinese herbal medicine might help
     
  3. Smashed__

    Smashed__ Well-Known Member

    he would fire me and theres no way i would recover from that..
     
  4. kote

    kote Account Closed

    ive a feeling i may be addicted to benzos.
    im on lorazapan and diazapam and a few others.
    i take them daily and my prescrption is at the overdose limit according to my dr.
    i dont have the time when i have urges for them, but im possitive if they were taken away id be screwed.

    hhhmmm???
     
  5. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I don't know exactly what your md would do if you told him you are an addict. He might not be able to help, but I don't think that he would necessarily cut you off.

    there's got to be somebody who would know what a dr would do. I can try to ask around about this
     
  6. lightbeam

    lightbeam Antiquities Friend

    I'm a vicodin addict. 5 years clean, and I still want to default to it to cure my 'pain'. It never gets any easier with benzos. The doctor I go to will stop treatment if he finds out that you take benzos or any other narcotic.

    Sucks to be me...
     
  7. Smashed__

    Smashed__ Well-Known Member

    yeah brennan treats you like a client with contract and if you dont listen, or try and OD on his meds he will "fire you". hes had two suicides in over twenty years and refuses to be apart of another.

    i dont blame hime but its semi manipulative for a bpd to have to choose, want help but cant because of fear of rejection.
     
  8. Caster

    Caster Well-Known Member

    If you don't get medical help I would at least try to ween off it slowly....it's not comfortable but that's what I did to get off xanax. The withdrawals will be a lot less severe too. I hope you're doing alright with it.
     
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