Sorry i mean i know it sucks, it's kinda like well if you're gonna do it anyway then why not find out how to do it painlessly. but the truth is (and i should know) when you do find an easy, painless way, it really does become more tempting, and that is a bad thing when you're trying to get better, you want as much as possible to put you off.
If you're really determind there there is information out there, tho how reliable it is I don't know, but none of us can stop you using google.
A much better idea tho is to talk about your problems, and try and get well with the rest of us.
Take care, and welcome.