Suicide is relatively easy. The action itself is just a decision to control the moment of ones own departure from this world. I don’t see anything wrong with this. My feelings are such that suicide is a neat exit, with all things taken care of, with few loose ends. The real dilemma is the impact it will have on those left behind. If I died in an accident, I will still be leaving them. Why should a considered, and planned exit be seen as somehow bad. I have taken stock of my life. And looking back, it is a life of unremitting mediocrity. I have always felt detached and disconnected. I have never had a relationship, as I have never felt worthy of anyones affections. I have never had close friends. No-one to call or fall back on. Gatherings are tense and full of angst, as I don’t feel I am entitled to be in their presence. I have never excelled at work, as I never felt good enough to progress career-wise. Added to which I don’t network, so don’t have the personal connections to get on. I love the world, and enjoy its beauty. Its just that I always seem to be an observer of it, rather than a participant. I love watching the stars at night, but am overwhelmed by the empty blackness between each star. I love the blue skies, but feel only the vast emptiness of its blueness. I feel my body is trapping my spirit inside it, that’s what’s causing my feelings of detachment. If I didn’t have a body, and released my spirit, I could become a part of the sky, or the hills, or the stars, and for the first time be part of something. I have always felt a burden. I acknowledge the beauty of nature, but hate my ugliness within it. Being a thoroughly analytical person, I have decided how to die. <Mod Edit: Abacus21 - methods> I want to celebrate my passing, even though no-one will be with me. I will celebrate nature by finally becoming part of it. I don’t understand the negativity of suicide. But I have to be aware of others preconceptions. The greatest weight on my mind is not being able to say goodbye to those I truly love, but have never been able to express it to. Here again, I don’t know if my love is even good enough for them. Anyway, that’s how I feel. Where can I find the best sunsets?