I know I've put my friend through so much over the past month and a half or so, and I feel terrible for upsetting him. I truly believe he saved my life multiple times just by being there for me. But this time, I think he killed me.
He promised me he wouldn't tell anyone about my depression and suicidal thoughts, as long as I promised to let him know when I wanted to hurt or kill myself, so that he could possibly help me. I held up my end of the deal quite well.
Yesterday I found out that he told a mutual friend about "his experience" with this whole ordeal: that he had a friend who was depressed and suicidal. Then he proceeded to write a blog post about his suicidal friend, and posted the link to his Facebook wall, so all of his friends, including our mutual friends, could see it.
My biggest fear is that other people will find out about this, and I've told my friend numerous times about this intense fear that people will find out and judge me, and I fear that with this blog post, they will figure out that it's me.
I feel so betrayed right now. I understand I've upset him and he needs to vent just as much as everyone else, but I feel like that was MY story to choose to tell or not.
People are going to be suspicious, and I don't know how I can go on anymore after this.
Thanks, friend, for sticking that knife in my back, I needed something xxxxxxxxx
He promised me he wouldn't tell anyone about my depression and suicidal thoughts, as long as I promised to let him know when I wanted to hurt or kill myself, so that he could possibly help me. I held up my end of the deal quite well.
Yesterday I found out that he told a mutual friend about "his experience" with this whole ordeal: that he had a friend who was depressed and suicidal. Then he proceeded to write a blog post about his suicidal friend, and posted the link to his Facebook wall, so all of his friends, including our mutual friends, could see it.
My biggest fear is that other people will find out about this, and I've told my friend numerous times about this intense fear that people will find out and judge me, and I fear that with this blog post, they will figure out that it's me.
I feel so betrayed right now. I understand I've upset him and he needs to vent just as much as everyone else, but I feel like that was MY story to choose to tell or not.
People are going to be suspicious, and I don't know how I can go on anymore after this.
Thanks, friend, for sticking that knife in my back, I needed something xxxxxxxxx
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