My family is a bit difficult to explain but I'll try my best... My closest family consists of my emotionally and physically abusive mother, my aunt, and their aunt (aka my late grandmother's sister). Then there's the rest of the family... some of them I've never seen (they don't approve of my mum being a single mum) and then there's all the 'cousins' who meet up once a year or so... I can never remember who is related to who, and who is talking to who... and worst of all... I sometimes forget who died (sorry that sounds harsh, but the past 10 years half of my family have died of cancer) And then there's the Swiss family... I think I am related to them by my mother's late father... really nice folks actually. A father, mother and a son my age. The parents are coming to Denmark... and they are gathering their relatives... which includes me and my close family... Years ago I was the kid... I was allowed to be socially awkward... No one expected much of me... I could sit in a corner with a book and no one batted an eyelid. Now they are going to expect me to talk... and worst of all "So, what do you do now??" If you don't have a job, you're nothing. My LDR boyfriend and I have already practiced ways to answer that... why I'm unemployed... "If only I had a family with good connections" lol. That made me laugh. In truth I am too sick physically and mentally to work currently... but they won't 'buy' that. Hopefully I can talk a bit about missing my job at the hospital, working with kids for one of the world best childhood obesity clinics... At least now I can say I have a boyfriend... but yeah, they are probably going to frown at the LDR aspect... And then there's the whole anxiety aspect. Most days I am too anxious to take the elevator down to take the bins out or check the mail... And my anxiety doesn't get less from the fear that one family member is there... Most of the family have cut him off, so hopefully he won't be... he has a really bad alcohol problem and lost his job and really hit rock bottom... Before the family cut him off, after having tried hard to help him, he was sort of chasing after me, (I think he's a cousins son or something, again, my family confuses me). At family gatherings he always wanted to talk and sit close to me... and then he added me on facebook and started sending me messaged commenting about my boobs in pics and stuff. He's addicted to two things, (at least) alcohol and young women. And I can't see what those girls see in him. And more socially awkward... the last family member died... was his mother... his sister is actually hosting the whole thing. She died after a month long stay at the hospital where I worked... and no I didn't visit. I actually did everything to avoid them, and I didn't go to the funeral either (some years ago I agreed I was done with funerals for a long while... when I overheard the widow sob to someone that it wasn't fair for me to experience so much death so young...). And on top of everything I am panicking about what to wear... I've always had bad scars on my arms, well since I started with SI when I was 13... lately my SI got really out of control and I've got even bigger new red scars. So I have to hide it... what I can hide... I know this is harsh... but I really don't like my family.