Bipolar Disorder- Severe depression Episode

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by loner060, Sep 25, 2012.

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  1. loner060

    loner060 Member

    In bed and can't stop crying...26/F on medication and recently just left hospital. I was treated for Bipolar II and clinical depression. I thought I was cured but I still pray to god that I die everyday. I will never have a normal relationship because of my psychotic moods and I'm beyond lonely....the tears just won't stop...please help
  2. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    Hi honey, am sorry for how you are feeling right now. I've been psychotic as well, in my past, because I was believing things that were not actually true. There IS a way out, and that is a journey of healing ourselves with what IS true :) But that takes a search and some guidance. Good that you've reached out for some companionship, SF is a wonderful caring place for that hun :) PM me any time if you'd like :)
  3. amk666

    amk666 Active Member

    Hey there, girl. It makes me so sad to find you in such straits. I've never experienced manic states or psychosis myself--major depression, sure. It must terrifying as well as saddening. I recently finished reading Kay Redfield Jamison's book, An Unquiet Mind. If you're not familiar it's a personal memoir of her own experiences with manic-depression. She tried to kill herself at age 28, endured numerous psychotic manias, but also completed her PhD in clinical psychology & now teaches psychiatry at Johns Hopkins. Of particular interest, I thought, was her account of stabilizing her lithium dosage over time. I know recommending a book under circumstances such as these is kind of lame, but I really think it would inform & give you hope to achieve the things you want in life.

    I do hope you start feeling better.
    We're always here:)

  4. Aria11

    Aria11 Member

    Hi there,

    I suffered from major depressive episodes too and just like you I am 25 and on meds. I know how you feel, I have been there and it is beyond terrifying. What worked for me is a combo of behavioural therapy and anti-depressive pills, but mostly, just getting out of bed, changing the things in my life that I can change, accepting things I can't change and a whole lot of exercising, healthy diet and something to keep me busy like a hobby, my job, anything.. I know now it is so hard to even lift a finger but trust me, and I speak from experience, when you do things will change. I used to wake up everyday thinking that this is the last day of my life.. I never tried to kill myself but what I was doing to myself was actually worse. I used to stay up in bed all night incapable of sleeping, used to cry if someone says hello to me.. I know it is hell. The pills should help with the crying and emotional stability. I am taking ephixor xr (I am bipolar so maybe for you your psychiatrist will recommend something different).

    But pills alone won't do the trick. You need to try changing little things everyday so you feel more in control of your life and then once you are stable, you can decide on bigger things. I used to be scared a lot, and I had to face my fears. I was at my first job and was scared of one of my bosses (he is terrible) and day by day as I got better, it was easier to face him and then once I was ok, I left my job for another one. I reallly think you should talk to people close to you, to professionals too and really trust me on this, exercise.

    People like us have to endure hell so it is even more important for us to keep healthy which is in my opinion a few things 1) get a lot of exercise 2) eat healthy food 3) get a hobby that takes your mind off things 4) have goals, they can be short term or not and get ur mind busy with planning how to reach them and implementing your plan 5) have 1 or 2 people to confide in (for me, it is my sisters 6) Do some yoga... Don't worry too much about finding the one, once you are at peace with yourself and you learn how to value your life and work on getting better ( you dont have to love it everyday just make sure you are doing what you need to do to stay sane), the one will come :)

    Please dont think about ending your life because you don't have to resort to that to feel less pain. Feel free to get in touch if ever you think of attempting it. I was there, and I know how you feel..

    Wish you all the best :)
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