Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Samsara, Nov 11, 2009.

  1. Samsara

    Samsara Well-Known Member

    I am almost positive that I am bisexual. I know this intellectually, but I am still not "convinced." In otherwords, I'm still in the closet. I have no problems with bisexuality or homosexuality, I just never really anticipated that I would be one. I've considered how it may be better than being straight. I've thought a lot of things...but the point is that I am afraid to come out, even to myself. I am afraid of the implications. AND I know that bisexuals are often discriminated against even by gay people. Many people think that bisexuality doesn't exist and that these people are "having trouble coming out," or "looking for edge."

    The fact is that is possible to be attracted to both sexes at the same time, because I am. That is that.

    If I come out, I am afraid that somehow it will affect my credibility as a thinker, even as a musician (my passion). I am also afraid that it will FURTHER hamper my ability to date. People may think I'm too flighty, that I'll screw anything that casts a shadow. They may think I'm immature. Whatever the hell they think.

    I'm pretty confused about it all. Even with my openly bisexual friends I have only said I THINK I'm bisexual. I've said it for sure.
  2. suzie_m

    suzie_m Member

    Don't be afraid to acknowledge who you are. Its can be difficult to be accepted and understood in any orientation. We may feel that we are being judged and scrutinized but when it comes down to it, your own acceptance of the person you are will matter the most. Be confident in who you are any people will see you for the genuine person you are, not as someones who's flighty and can't commit. It is a shame that bisexualism isn't understood too well in the wider community, but there are also many of us who acknowledge this to be a genuine orientation.
    Those who are dear to you will hopefully be understanding and supportive:cheekkiss Best of luck.
  3. Rayne

    Rayne Well-Known Member

    I agree with everything that Suzie has said, but would just like to add a few things.

    Regarding your credibility, you might want to have a look at this (very long) list of famous writers, actors, musicians (etc.) who have identified themselves as bisexuals. It might help put your mind at ease. Chögyam Trungpa is a great example of people retaining their credibility. He "was one of the most influential teachers of Buddhism in the west. He is the founder of Shambhala International."

    Its understandable that you're confused at the moment, its really something you can allow yourself to feel rushed into deciding. Explaining to people that you only think you could be bisexual is completely reasonable. Maybe if you tried telling this to people you are close to, you'll become more comfortable with the possibility and you will be able to think about it more clearly. Looking online for other experiences coming out to their families and friends might help - people seem to broadcast their stories on YouTube often. Bisexuality is becomming increasingly more frequent and acceptable, though there are always going to be people discriminating against others for their sexuality. You could try looking on the comments at the bottom of this page.

    Hope this helps a little!
  4. bubblin girl

    bubblin girl Well-Known Member

    dear...I belive in bI and so many what you is yourlife...if you are happy being bi then be a one...nobody are responisble of your happence than are the matter :cheekkiss::arms:
  5. Kris.T

    Kris.T Well-Known Member

    Coming out, and being able to accept it is pretty hard to overcome. But you can't help who you are attracted to. You just need to take your time with it really, and in time you'll get a better understanding of who you are. People should be pretty understanding of your situation, although having said that I haven't told any of my friends I'm bi either.. :unsure:
  6. 1victor

    1victor Well-Known Member

    Go to some place where nobody knows you and try to be yourself.
    See if the lifestyle fits you.
    And if it doesn't it's easy to get back home without having any consequences.