Black days

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by ACRon, Oct 19, 2006.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    One day after his 19th birthday
    He cleared out his wardrobe
    Bags of 80's retro clothing.
    He bought all that stuff
    to fill a hole in his empty life.

    But the sharp cut,
    the heroin chiq look,
    was never enough,
    to justify his love.

    He looks at the world with destain.
    He hates everything and everyone.
    Not least of all himself.
    The part of himself he hated?
    the part that made him the same as everyone else.

    He followed every word he was taught,
    he lived a life of plenty
    with a passion so unique
    & a smile so complete.

    But one by one
    all his friends around him
    gave him the impression
    he was wrong about something.
    He questioned himself night and day.
    The world he created slowly peeled away.

    He felt cold and desolate,
    his love was bland and insufficient,
    to get him through those days.
    When all he saw was black,
    there was no going back.
    He knows too much,
    he leaves it at that.
  2. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I like it!:smile: Especially the last four lines.

  3. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    Yeah ta, I try to put thing in terms of black and white to keep it simple. But I know in my heart theres so much more than the prejudices we are taught. There seems so little in the way of anything else. black white east west left right up down. always a way of exploring a conscience that bleeds nothing but competitive discrimination. I long for a different mode of thought
  4. * * *
    You did a great job of expressing just that thought.
    There are things we have in common,
    but there are things we seek
    when we are weak
    in order just to belong,
    whether it's right or wrong...

  5. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    exactly, I think the world is everyone's oyster, sucking us into its guilty pleasures. Its that constant battle that leads us to who we are. When I look down I see nothing but love, But choosing that is suicide. The big bang and all that. No way. I just want to end, shut down, no dramatics

  6. Well... the Big Bang *did* bring on *endless* beginnings - yet as many deaths would be inevitable. Maybe all is indeed as it should be - all I know is I'm tired. Know you are too... Acceptance and peace (with how things are) is different than defeat ...Interesting thought that seeing love is suicide - perhaps it's the ultimate Big Bang, for us humans at least... but I'm tired of the 'drama' too...Guess there's no way we can stop it...How do we keep our eyes closed once having seen... *sigh*

  7. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    Well yes, love is suicide to me because Im logging around an ex that I can't let go of. making promises to her (with my hand) that I shouldn't. she's one in a million but I took her for granted so she's served me my ass on a plate. But when she's happy, Im happy but she texts me from time to time telling me how miserable she is, and im like, what can I do? you think Im slime. But then a few days later she's telling me how happy she is (usually whilst drugged off her face) bragging about her sexual conquests. I try and let her go like she wants but then she dangles a carrot at me like "maybe in the future we could work things out" and I tell her to ditch the drugs and her friends and I'll think about it. I think she's obsessed with making me worry about her because she's still angry that I made her pay her half of the rent and refused to let her leech of me like some kind of parasite. While she's on my case I can't move on. She's like a terrorist to reasonable thought. aagh, :mad: wound up now, sorry, not anyones fault but mine
  8. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    I think you did wonderfuly with your poem! :hug:

    :clap: :clap: :clap:


  9. Sounds like a lot of mind games going on betwixt thyselves.
    I've always tried to avoid those - not always successful.
    I was also never one to try to attain 'conquests' , let alone brag about them -so I'm admittedly unfamiliar with this game as well.
    Perhaps you've met your match - or perhaps you can decide what you want and need in your life - and what you can do without.
    Tough call?
    Maybe not...
    when you ask yourself how things will truthfully come to rest
    What's the big picture you forsee?

    See what a wee bit of dangerous poetry can start?!

    {crooked grins]
  10. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    Predicting my future successfully would be like finding a needle in a haystack, I don't believe in tarots, I just respect the waves:wink:
  11. I know what you mean, but it seems like self-inflicted torture to continue on in this way with the relationship (...not that we're not unfamilair with the concept here). Addictions come in many forms, wot? I don't do Tarot either, but your line about respecting waves put me in mind of this:
    * * *

    "I heard a nice little story the other day," Morrie says. He closes his eyes for a moment and I wait.
    "Okay. The story is about a little wave, bobbing along on the ocean, having a grand old time. He's enjoying the wind and the fresh air - until he notices the other waves in front of him, crashing against the shore.

    " 'My God, this is terrible,' the wave says. 'Look what's going to happen to me!'

    "Then comes along another wave. It sees the first wave, looking grim, and it says to him, 'Why do you look so sad?'

    "The first wave says, 'You don't understand! We're all going to crash! All of us waves are going to be nothing! Isn't it terrible?'

    "The second wave says, "No, YOU don't understand. You're not a wave, you're part of the ocean.' "

    I smile. Morrie closes his eyes again.

    "Part of the ocean," he says, "part of the ocean." I watch him breathe, in and out, in and out.

    ~ From "Tuesdays with Morrie" by Mitch Albom - Published by Doubleday - copyright 1997

    * * *

    FAL1 (it's something I try to remember - not always successful)
  12. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    Yeah that makes sense

    I only wrote a poem on the spare of the moment, its as much a story as anything else. Did I mention that I finished with this girl 3 years ago? did I mention that I've had 3 girlfriends since? A full character debate isn't something I want to get into, can you let this one go please? sorry if thats stern or rude, I mean no offence:shake:
  13. Your call - no harm, no foul...

    It's just this place is where people lay down their souls in words.

    I tend to take them on...

    Last edited: Oct 24, 2006
  14. ACRon

    ACRon Well-Known Member

    I share what I choose to, thats all, a good artist leaves the audience wanting more.........

    clever clogs:laugh:
  15. BTW - I *love* your Sig quote...

    "After the game
    the king and the pawn go into the same box"

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.