I've been dealing with my depression since I was 9 years old (I'm currently 19) and suicide has been an almost daily thought since I was 12 or 13 I'm not really sure when depression/suicidal thoughts usually manifest themselves in people, has anyone else experienced them this early? I've tried to get help (therapy,medication,etc) but nothing really seems to help. I've never really had a very close bond to my family, so I havent ever told them about the suicidal things, mainly because I don't want to worry them. I really just don't feel a strong enough connection with anyone to confide in them, so I figure it's better to do it anonymously through a computer screen to a bunch of people I don't know. At this point, I'm not really sure how much of a risk I am to myself. Most days are better than others, but recently killing myself has been something I think about more and more. I really do want to be happier, I just don't know how.