Blah - Just my thoughts

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by *dilligaf*, Apr 20, 2010.

  1. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    I feel so depressed recently. I have felt so low for so long now and it's just getting boring. Waking up each day still feeling shit. When's it going to change?

    I'm depressed at how I look. Not just my weight, which has been a problem for my whole life, but also the spots that have appeared recently, and the huge bags around my eyes.

    I'm sick of the fighting going on, and being in the middle of it. I stayed upstairs for about an hour today, to try to avoid it, when I came down he's still here .. Not shouting anymore, just a bad atmosphere. Why do I get dragged into their fights?

    Then there's the next year. I didn't want to post about it but looks like I am going to. My own fault, I said I wanted to do it .. and if you are reading this .. I do :) Doesn't stop it hurting like hell, keeping me awake at night, and breaking my heart at just the thought of it.

    Waiting to hear back from the college about my interview date. Maybe they've decided I'm not good enough? Wouldn't surprise me.

    People are annoying me. Not my friends before any of you think that .. Just people in general. Just annoying, making me mad. Then I snap at them and end up feeling even worse.

    Two people have deleted me off of Facebook in the last week. One of which i'm not that bothered about since we had a fight a while back and haven't really spoken since. But the other one is my stepdad's daughter .. I was talking to her on Monday and everything was fine ... Then went to talk to her on Friday and she had deleted me ... And wont answer my texts to find out why.

    I'm bored. Want to do something but I have no idea what. Fallen out with a so called mate so can't even go around to hers like I would usually do.

    I've been thinking about doing something. We aren't talking about anything bad like s/h or anything .. but something that isn't good for me .. The end result is veryvery good though :-D :unsure:

    Gah, ignore me, just a ramble. I'll post more when I find the energy.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 20, 2010