Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by TJ, Apr 23, 2011.

  1. TJ

    TJ Staff Alumni

    ive been keep a diary for myself , to try and get some of those " unsaid secerts" out .. and its been great for the fact that i can say how horrible and how much of a fuck wit i really am and not have anyone reply to that trying to make me feel better ..

    i really am a terrible person and no one wants to believe that , they want to believe the person i make myself out to be on here , its easy on here to hold up fake masks and pretend to be someone ur not .

    all i know is that im useless and now defeated , life holds nothing for me , and i hold nothing thats worth anything for anyone else , ive failed this site , the genuine ppl on here and ive failed myself so horribly .

    im sorry to everyone who reads this that u thought i was a good person , that i lead u to believe a lie , im sorry that i just cant keep doing this and make ur life easyier instead of harder ... ive said enough ... im done
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    This sounds like the decries of someone in pain, not a bad person...I have felt like a fraud so many times, felt like I never do enough,always expect something from someone, am not understanding...etc etc...and these voices are mostly active when I am in a lot of pain...also, I know that everyone feels like this from time to time...sorry you are not feeling good about yourself and I hope you do consider how others see lovely, and giving...J
  3. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    Lot's of people think that they are horrible, even if the have done things that they think are bad, the fact you are on this site helping other people says different. Sorry my words are failing me right now but Esther i hope you stay and work though this.
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Yup you do sound so much like me i say all time if peole knew me they would not see a good person at all. It is your pain inside you that makes you see yourself that way. It is old msg from long ago You coming here talking to us caring says you are good okay and you do matter to us you are not useless at all you are someone okay special hugs
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    You are a great person esther :hug: