Blegh

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xan

Chat Buddy
#1
I wonder how much of my 'self' is left, I purposefully sculpted myself into what I am, cut away the pain, chased away my weakness, beat out my flaws... And now all that's left is emptiness. I feel like I'm more of what I wanted to be, but that it's all meaningless as my ability to feel anything is gone. If I try and feel anything at all it just ends up souring and causing me pain. Maybe this IS life, maybe before I just felt too much... I guess if I'd never felt everything I did I'd be happy, if this was all I knew. I don't want to keep complaining so I'll just shut my stupid fat mouth now.
 

total eclipse

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
#2
Please know i understand i truly can relate to what you posted and No you do not need to keep quiet you keep posting okay You have already help me see me a bit cleared hugs to you
 

eagles_fan

Well-Known Member
#3
So you don't feel like a person?

Well, you are. We've all been through times when we've felt like we didn't know who we were. We all have certain personality traits that make us who we are. Some people don't like some aspect of their personality, so they work to change themselves for the better. Some people are completely fine with who they are. I do think that a part of us chooses who we are.

But I feel your true problem is depression. When I was clinically depressed, all I felt was sorrow, pain, anger, and misery. I don't think I was ever happy then and I don't think I ever felt anything else. That's just what happens when you're depressed. I feel you should call a counselor and try to set up an appointment. Try to find out exactly what's causing you this pain. Get to the bottom of it and overcome it. I know you can do it.

Eat healthy and get some sunlight. Those things affect our mood much more than people think.

Feel free to tell us anything else about your condition.
 
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