Bleh

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by John6491, Apr 24, 2007.

  1. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    I really have no idea why i keep on living... everything i do is just another mistake to people... Everyone wants me to be like him the good kid that is perfect i cant stand having them set that as what they want from me.. what the fuck is perfect anyways? They expect me to get all good grades and when i dont im called a failure and i need to fucking try harder but i do fucking try and i just cant get it right. I have no friends.. no one likes me... im weird, ugly, annoying and just plain fucked up.. Give me a fucking reason why i should even stay alive and dont say "Just hold on it will get better" Cause... IT WILL NEVER GET BETTER!!! You have no idea if it will get better or fucking worse... so dont give me crap like that.. bleh i really sound like a asshole...
     
  2. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    John. :hug: I feel the same way, everyday. You just have to hold on and hope everything will be alright, you just don't know if it will or not, why not stick around and see if it will? I think it'll get better for you. My PM box is open if you need to talk.
     
  3. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    The way things are looking its all downhill from here :( it wont get better i just know it...
     
  4. you dont no it hun, you just think it. it could go either way, try to hold onto the hope that things will and can get better. here if you need to chat x
     
  5. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    I have been holding on and im just tired of holding on.. i just want to die so bad... i dont want to see my mom die.. i hate seeing here like she is now.. you can see how much pain she is in and its really hard to even look at her... :sad: i know i should stay for her but when she dies everything will become a fucking mess.. my dad will drink even more and prob get into more fights with me.. i dont want to wait and see if that happens... (sry if im not making sense..)
     
  6. you are making sence , i just cant think of the words to answer you. im so sorry, i wish i had a magical answer but i just dont. i am here though and i have listened to you, though i doubt if your feeling this bad it will be of much use. i no your sick of holding on, and i can see and understand why, but maybe if you hold on that tiny bit longer, things may seem a little better.. its surely worth a try? x
     
  7. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    John. I know what it's like a have a dad that drinks and picks fights, all too well.... I don't know what it's like to be losing a parent though, I know it must be tough, but you have to hold on for her John, just hold on for her.

    As for the dad thing, if it's physical, do you have a friend you could stay with for a while?
     
  8. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    Ehh don't have any friends that would let me stay with them for a bit... well one but his mom hates me so she wont let me stay there
     
  9. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Do you have any family, a teacher..Anyone?
     
  10. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    Ehh most of my family is out of state or a few hours drive away.... and i dont like any of my teachers
     
  11. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Hmm...
    I have an idea!
    Come to Florida and live in the spare room here.
    Haha. Just kidding. =]

    I don't know...
    Have you talked to anyone about your dad?
     
  12. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    lol

    Yea my family knows about my dad that he hits and is abusive but they dont do shit about it...
     
  13. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    They don't do anything about it...
    =/
     
  14. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    Yep they dont do anything to help...
     
  15. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Do any of your teachers know?
     
  16. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    2 of the teachers know
     
  17. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Have they talked to your family about it?
     
  18. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    One of them talked to my mom and thats it.. they didn't really do anything about it though
     
  19. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Hmm...
    Have you tried talking to a counselor?
     
  20. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    Yes i have but they said my family needs to figure out what to do about it...