Hi I found this site today. I would seriously prefer not to post this but I thought oh why not since I am probably gonna end up dead anyway. I'm 18, male. I have researched the most suitable method of self termination. If I do attempt it will not fail. It will be swift and painless. It is said that depression is what causes suicide. True. I am depressed. But I am not letting the depression influence my thinking. My suicide is not without reason. It is the depression that inspired me to come up with a logic that is undeniable. I have nothing left to live for in this world. This world has nothing left to offer. I am different. That is all I could say about myself. I'm different. I am different. I don't understand why some people see it as a very hard concept to grasp. My perception of this world is different. I have no place in this society, and I do not have anything to give back to it. I am a sensible person, and as a sensible person, my act of committing suicide is logical. I hate being a burden. I am a sinner, but I never caused hardship to anyone. I'm probably going to hell. I don't get to choose who I am, it is chosen for me. I am thankful to God for giving me a life and I am sorry for being such a bad person. I am not saying I am a bad person because I see things negatively, I am saying it because I fit the definition of a bad person. I'm lonely. I know I am not the only lonely person in this world, but I just want to say that because I feel like saying it. If only you could feel how MY loneliness feels like. Then again who doesn't wish that they can share their version of loneliness. I never had any place to tell my problems, to tell what bothers me, to tell how I feel today. I want you to know that I understand this. No one wants to be lonely. I just wanted someone else to know about my story. I feel I deserve the chance to express myself just this once and not care what other people think. Right now, I am waiting for something to set me off, and that something will come soon enough. My departure shall be a silent vendetta against my sorry life. There is nothing wrong with the world but something is wrong with me. I blame no one. Some things are just meant to be. Suicide is inevitable. No matter how hard you may try to stop it, it will still be done. There are those who have nothing left to lose, and those who are willing to give up everything. They are not you and you are not them. You cannot explain what the color blue looks like to a blind man.