School was weird. Socializing is awkward. Being in front of people gives me nervous twitches. Fuck it. Gotta learn to wear a mask and such. My shyness gets me props because I don't drag a story out. I make things short and simple. I sit next to people that are stupid. They don't know simple arithmetic. They call me smart. I'm not smart. Smart is my friend. Somebody who I want to be like. Knowing so many languages, how to play on peoples emotions, how to connect with people, etc. I often emulate this person. People in my class are there for shitty reasons. I'm there because I want to learn. They are there because they are desperate for a future. I wouldn't want just that to be my future. I need more. Nothing has brought excitement to me that is "important". A lot of things that are supposed to be landmarks in life don't mean anything to me. It's just another experience to me. I hope I can find something that I love and care about. A passion that I can actually get angry about when I don't succeed and cry when I triumph. I am just bored.