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Bon Voyage

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5

5ohFreak

#1
My life turned upside down in the past month. My best friend of three years broke up with my for a local cop named Jason. I bought this girl everything she ever wanted. I would have layed in front a bus for her. But some dickhead local cop with his fake ass limp dick took her away from. I hate those dousebags. But I cannot do anything about it cause he's a cop. She left me cause I work out of town all the time and work alot of hours.

I quit my job because she was the only reason why I was working. I was trying to save up alot of money so one day we can get a house and start a family.:sad:

I've been at the bars ever since and just wrecked my nice Jeep the other day falling asleep at the wheel. Thank god I was alone....I dont need to hurt anybody else. My parents are striahgt up druggies(herion) and dont say much to me. My mom laughed at me over my g/f breaking up with me. I was just trying to talk to somebody.:sad: I'm acting normal to everybody cause I'm supposed to be a man and hide everything. I ate 2 Oxy's the other night and drank some Blacktooth. My room mate called me an ambulance and they pumped some shit into me. They were asking me what I had and said I just drank to much. Asking me all these questions and I was like let me go. He came home at 3 o clock and said I looked like a ghost.

That didnt work so I'm going to take my car out for a ride right now and slam it into a poll doing 160. That should settle it.

Oh I have to go give my buddy my gun collection first. Can;t forget about that and write a letter to my dearest lady.

Thanks for reading, I know talk is cheap but I just wanted to say something.
 

Jenny

Staff Alumni
#2
Hi and welcome to the forum

I'm really glad that you found us, although am so sorry that you have reason to be here. It really does sound like you've been through a hell of a lot recently.. it's understandable that you're feeling depressed and hopeless.

Did it help you at all to write your feelings down here? I know we're an internet forum but please be assured that you have been heard. I read your post and i hear you. I just wish i could do more than this.. i wish there was a magic wand i could wave and make things better for you..

Is there anyone 'in real life' you can lean on for support right now? You mention the friend you need to give your gun collection to.. is this someone who you could talk to and confide in? How about your room mate? Do you have a doctor who you could talk to.. or a local counsellor? Of course, we're here for you too and you're always welcome to talk here. We're not here to judge you.. just listen and give you a safe place to vent. You don't have to hold your feelings in around here.

I really do hope you reconsider about ending your life. I know it's cliche but things can get better.. ok so you're not in a job at the moment but you could get one.. one that's closer to where you live and where you don't need to work as many hours. You can meet new people. I know it probably seems all so pointless given the despair you are in at the moment, but please hold on to something. Please let us get to know you.. you sound like a nice guy.

I'm thinking of and am here for you
:hug:
 
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