first - i don't know if i'm posting in the right forum. if not, please move my thread, thank you. second - i realize that this will be a long and boring thread, and anyone who will read through it and offer their advice has my gratitude. hi, i don't post a lot but i've been here for about half a year now. i had been very depressed for quite a while prior to finding this site, and coming here has been a great alternative to cutting. i am now, for the most part, recovered, save for a few relapses. i will however be taking wellbutrin for the rest of my life. my girlfriend of four months now has some problems. she will not see a therapist nor will she use this site or any other. for the purpose of this thread i will refer to her as katie. katie is 16. her mother smoked and drank while carrying her, likely contributing clinically to her current depression. she is physically normal. katie's parents began abusing her before she turned 10, this continues today. this abuse ranges from being thrown into walls and into the floor to being smacked across the face with rings. she has also been abused by previous boyfriends. her father has her in karate specifically as an excuse for her bruises. katie has a strong mind and absolutely refuses to seek any help, including from child protective services. she has denied that anything was wrong when she's been investigated before and will continue to do the same. my girlfriend displays a lot of the behaviors that i did before my recovery. i am able to see her every day. she has cried on my couch and on my floor for hours at a time. she has my name, among other things, carved deeply into her skin, in a personal area. she persists in her delusions that she is worthless and that i am going to leave her, that i do not really love her, etc. she became very attached to me very quickly. she has climbed up on my balcony and put bottles of pills in her mouth, in order to prevent me from leaving her - something i have never intended to do. if i see other friends, she becomes jealous and angry. the same happens if she sees a number in my phone she doesn't like. she has become violently aggressive toward other girls in public whom she believed to be looking at me the wrong way. she insists that i am perfect and she will be with me forever. she has extremely unrealistic plans for the future, all of which she truly believes in. i care deeply for this person and i would not for one second judge her or criticize her for any of this, not with my experience. she is tremendously intelligent, as are most people that suffer from depression, and she is a whole person, nothing less. i have lost friends over her who insist that she is "controlling." this is true, but she can't help it, and she deserves a chance just like anyone else. i am however very concerned for katie's future. she is at times certainly a danger to herself, as are her parents. i don't know what to do if she won't seek help. i would like to be able to continue to support her, but the above suggests that she has borderline personality disorder. this would mean that any feelings she has for me are a product of spontaneous infatuation, and will thus subside without notice. this would deeply hurt me. i'd like to know if anyone here has any experience with bpd, as i currently don't believe that my girlfriend is incapable of love or honestly caring about someone, like the textbooks say. i would like to believe that our relationship is actually based on something. can anyone help me out with that? i'd also like any suggestions on what can be done for a person who won't seek professional help. i will be truly grateful to receive any responses, i understand that there are many more important issues here with people that are suffering much more than me. thank you to anyone who read my post.