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Boyfriend feels I don't need him anymore.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by feathers, Dec 7, 2010.

  1. feathers

    feathers Well-Known Member

    I had a four month spell of pretty severe depression and clinging to life, I came to depend on my boyfriend. He was there for me, he did everything for me. I really did depend on him to help me through it.

    However, now that the depression has passed, he feels useless. He feels like I "don't need him anymore", and since I am the type of girl who has a fair few guys after her, he knows I could easily get someone else if I wanted to. He won't accept however, that I want him. He won't accept that I don't to leave him just because I don't "need" or "depend" on him anymore. I turn it around to say that he doesn't depend on me in the same way yet he's still here, but he still is kicking up a fuss about it :|.

    Anyone had something like this? Think he'll get past it, or he'll just feel worse now that I'm better and back to being confident?

    K x
  2. Joshuwa

    Joshuwa Well-Known Member

    from a guys point of view, i'd say just try and "over-love" (lots of affection and all that) him for a little while until he feels more secure

    i think that would probably work on me
  3. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    Maybe he wants to break up and is using that as a way to let you down easy?
  4. feathers

    feathers Well-Known Member

    Haha, fawkes. There is not a chance that that is true. He absolutely adores me, there's no way he wants to break up with me, haha. He's just always been self-conscious about not being good enough for me. Now it's even worse.

    Thanks for your replies :).
  5. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    Well, you should point out that the break from depression probably isn't going to last... It's unusual for suicidal-strength depression to show up for 4 months and then go away forever.

    (Read up on bipolar, it's more likely to behave that way, and if that is the correct diagnosis you should start receiving treatment for it)
  6. feathers

    feathers Well-Known Member

    aoeu, I know that it won't be gone forever. I have had it multiple times. I don't have bipolar because I don't have mania or hypomania, but I think I have borderline personality disorder, and as such I am seeing a psychiatrist next week :). Thank you for replying.