You're going through a really hard time and I'm so sorry that this is happening. All these thoughts, all these speculations must be so painful for you, my heart goes out to you. I get it, you can't help who you fall in love with, and on the flip side of the coin you can't really make someone love you either. Falling for someone whose feelings are not reciprocated is obviously heart-rendering. Stepping back and letting it pass is easier said than done I guess, but maybe ask yourself one question, what is more important, - being in love with someone who does not have the same level of intensity, or finding someone who does. That was just a thought that popped into my mind, but whatever happens, I wish the best for you.
I know that the obvious is letting it go but... I can't. I don't want to be with someone I love less than him and... I can't stop loving him. And we were a good team, we were perfect to each other and...I feel that if he hadn't moved to another city we would have a chance (well, he told me, and aded that we can talk about us when he is back but...when is this? I don't know, he may know it or not). I need that second opportunity because I have that feeling that we could make it this time. This is why I'm keep going. I had been in love other times and I wasn't so broken, with this feeling of "this shouldn't be like this". I can't explain... I need him to see me. Our connection is still there, the sparkle, tha attraction even if we didn't see each other in a year. We talked about it. He even said that whatever it happened between us when we met (a meeting which ended up not happening) it wouldn't mean it was the last thing, that we'll always have the chance of having more.
I believe in us and... I need that chance. I am aware that he is not crying for me, I know that he has his feelings for me "sleeping" or something like that. But... I need to try. I need him... I know that I'm stubborn with this but I know how he is, and I can't stand not having anything with him never more.