So I was sexually abused since before I can remember until I was 10, and raped when I was 10. (I'm learning to deal with this gradually and have a great base of support now). However, 2 weeks ago, I was raped again. I was very drunk and did nothing about it. My housemates found out and are being so lovely about it but it was one of their friends who did it and I feel like I've caused a whole load of grief for everyone. I had to tell his girlfriend too. I feel like I've destroyed a whole load of relationships/friendships and nobody will ever trust me again! I've only lived with my new housemates for 2 months and they are all amazing, I would hate to have to leave or to have them hate me! But I can't help what happened now. It's all I think about, it's making me physically ill I hate how, something that should only really affect me, has caused so much chaos in everybody's lives around me! I don't want to be one of these people that men prey upon. Like when you're bullied as a kid you're more likely to be bullied as an adult. I don't want to be the same with this! I know when I'm drunk I get myself into stupid situations but I was at home, there were people around! I just can't understand why this had to happen! Sorry, I know this isn't so much a question, but I just needed to put it somewhere. I need advice, I just don't know what kind. Anything would be helpful.