Bullsh*t family and life !!!! I'm done

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by timmay20, Mar 1, 2009.

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  1. timmay20

    timmay20 Member

    hello my is Tim.:sad:

    I hate my life and family to death. I would like to tell why from the beginning. My mother has three kids from different men and it makes me sick:mad:.My uncles have mental illiness, so bad that they attack many members of my family including myself(when I was younger). My grandmother smoked(cigarette) herself to death, and the other members family I have no connection with.

    My life is crap and should have killed myself long time ago because I'm a worthless loser. I'm a high school drop-out,no GED, I stay in the house all day, I have no job, and I'm 21. My father died when I was five and I never went to his grave because my mother never took me. I have no one to turn too, and I'm mad as hell. I just found out my mother has secert boyfriend on the side, and I feel like she shouldn't because I never got over my fathers death. Me and mother do not get along at all, but I'm very grateful for letting me stay in her house. I'm done living on this earth. I'm unhappy and alone with people I don't like.

    I going to kill myself !!!!!! My mother is a bitch and I'm pissed she move on so easy from my father. I'm a middle child, I have younger and older sister. My younger sister father left my mother because he had another family, but lied to her about it and my older sister father is in jail. I'm her only son, who will be dead soon. I'm looking forward to never seeing that worthless witch again. Sorry my post was long:sad:
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hiya Timmay. There's a lot on your plate and it would weigh anyone down.

    First, I respectfully disagree that it's worth giving up your life. Yes, the family situation was unfair, and yes, others treated you badly a number of times. But if you kill yourself...I dunno...it's like letting those people get the better of you. Me? I wouldn't want to give them anything more than they've already taken.

    You say you are worthless. That can't be true. If you were truly worthless, your mother wouldn't let you stay in her house. On some level she cares about you - you are worth something to her.

    It's never too late to start making changes that improve our lives. You can look into getting your GED. You might get a part time job while you do your GED studies. There are always options - better ones than suicide or anything that is self-destructive in any manner.

    All the things that hurt and make you angry...I think you have a good grip on what those things are, but you're struggling to leave them behind you. Have you gone to a counselor? Are you on antidepressants? A trip to the doctor to see if you need meds and a referral to a therapist couldn't hurt.

    I really hope that you do not do anything desperate. Maybe tomorrow you could call your doctor's office and make that appointment? And sometime further down the road, find info on getting your GED?

    Stay safe. :hug:
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Tim,
    welcome to the forum!! You know it is never too late to go to where your father rests and just sit there and talk to him..As long as he is in your heart he will always be with you and watch over you.. You don't need to do anything rash. Like Acy said there are always options you just need to sit back and think about them..You also could do voliunteer work at an animal shelter, or an Adult Living Facility..You could here some interesting stories from the SR. Citizens.. They are a wealth of information that is falling to the way side because now adays our generation just locks them away and forgets about them. Just think about it o.k. Take care!!!
  4. timmay20

    timmay20 Member

    Thank you for your support.:smile: But I'm lost right now.:sad:
  5. Nazza

    Nazza Guest

    I hope you will be ok.
    I feel so bad alot of the time but something seems to pull me through. I know how frustrating living can be and im sorry you feel this way.
    I hope you can stick around and find a way....
  6. flowerpot

    flowerpot Well-Known Member

    I know life has been shit for you.. but.. i think you need to make a life for yourself.. & i think you can
    Don't let your family hold you back, if you really dislike them so much, don't let them win?
    Don't you have hobbies, passion?
    You should try to get a job, or go back to school/college, make friends, move out.. there is so much you could try then things could get better for you
    You deserve a happy enjoyable life & i hope you find it
  7. timmay20

    timmay20 Member

    Thank you. I have been shouting matches with mom over her new boyfriend. :sad: I have no one to talk too!!!!!:sad:
  8. Troubled2008

    Troubled2008 Well-Known Member

    Man, I definitely think you need to get some independence and get AWAY from them! You associate yourself and your life with THEIR lives and of course, it IS associated to a degree... But you're saying that your whole life, for the rest of time, is THEIR life. What's up with that? I have known so many people with messed up families! Everytime I look in the mirror, I see one of them! Heh...

    I would try to get a good job and some cashola. You could get your GED part time on the side. Beyond that this will get you going somewhere and make you happier, it will get you out of the house and away from all that negativity!!

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