I wish I had access to all this site when I was in my lower years at school. In both primary school, secondary school, and my years at high school were made complete hell by bullys. I have always been too scared to stand up for myself. I used to get smacked pretty harshly by my parents when I was younger, to an extent it done me good, kept me in line. But now im realising the effects it has had on me. I could never hit my parents back when I was younger, I learnt that when they shout at you, smack you, whatever, you always obey them. In primary school I had a few friends, but not many. There was this one lad who I was always good friends with, yet one day, he turned on me for no apparent reason, an he used to bully me. He found this watch on the floor, he kept it, and there was a button that said "lock-on". At playtimes and stuff he used to find me, press the button, say it was locked onto me, then he would give me 10 seconds to run before he would catch me an beat me up. I couldn't get away from it, I felt trapped, I had nowhere to go. The bruises down my legs were a regular sight, ones I tried to keep hidden from my family, for fear they would see me as weak, which to a certain extent I am. But one day mum saw the bruises and she flipped, demanding how I got them. I told her the truth and she went up the school and that was the end of it for me. I then made friends with this other lad in primary school, we were great mates, yet as soon as we went to middle school, he made new friends and then they were known as "the gang" and all throughout middle school they bullied me. This old friend then made my life hell, demanding I do things for him. He often used to try to make me kiss a brick wall, which I never did, but he insisted that I either do that or get a beating. I just took the beating. I used to have to hide from them at break and lunch time to stop this from happening. I know this doesn't sound much, but it was extremely intimidating. Nobody stuck up for me, and nobody cared. I'd done nothing to deserve it. I just wanted to get on with my life. There were so many incidents throughout middle and high school that it would take forever to list them. I often felt alienated. There was no-one there for me. No-one to turn to. No one to help me. Getting beaten up after school was a regular occurence, and I hate every single one of them who ever put me through all that crap. Shoving grass in my mouth whilst being pinned down to the floor, being kicked in the head, having fag butts put out on my ear, having my school bag set alight to, having water poured into my locker, having my coat put in the toilet, looking back on it, I really don't know how I coped. But one things for sure, I should never have let it start. You have to stand up for yourself in life, otherwise these kinda people will walk all over you whenever they get the chance. Don't take crap from anyone!