Last week it looked like there might be some good news with my job situation. I had a good interview with a good company. They couldn't hire me right away because they are expanding, but they said they should be ready for me in a week and a half. I should be doing cartwheels. Instead, I'm turning on myself. I'm always second guessing everything. All this week I've been wondering, "What if it takes longer for them to get ready for me," and "Did he actually offer me the position or am I just reading into things he said?" To be on the safe side, I should be looking for work just in case this job falls through. But I'm so burned out, I can barely look at the job lead sites anymore. Everytime I try, my brain goes limp. I'm worried that I'm going to be in trouble when everyone is telling me that everything's going to be fine and that I will be working soon. After trying (and failing) to do some decent job search work today, I decided to try and make at least one thing in my apartment work. I looked around and saw that my CDs were strewn all over the apartment and it was impossible to find anything. I've let the situation spiral into chaos for months. So I decided, if nothing else, at least I'll get my CDs organized. At least that'll be something. Maybe it was a waste of time, but it felt productive. I'm currently waiting to be matched up with a therapist at the local counceling center. Someone called and wanted to know if I could come in next week. NEXT WEEK? What about tomorrow, I asked. He said he'd see what he could do. Called a few of my friends to tell them that I was probably clinically depressed. Nobody was surprised. I, however, was surprised to find out that a few of them have been on prozac for years! How do we all find each other? My head hurts. Tomorrow, I'll force myself to go to the work source center and use their computers to look for work instead of staying at home with my own computer. That way I'll be forced to be productive for at least a couple of hours. Little things bother me... but I think that's another post altogether. I'll do that one later or tomorrow. For everyone who's coping... Good job.