Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Soldier83, Sep 12, 2012.

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  1. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    Bye everyone thanks for taking the time listen to me. I wish you good times and good friends.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi soldier, why are you leaving? I really hope it is for good reasons.
  3. LiquidSoap

    LiquidSoap Member

    I don't know if we have met but I really hope you're okay, please take care, really hope you're alright :)
  4. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    Just hoping you're okay...?
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hugs to you hun stay safe please
  6. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    No I'm not alright, my mom had a brain aneurism, I think my wife cheated on me when she went to her managers convention, and my Dad told me not to call him anymore. No I'm not doing alright. I'm drinking again. Alot again. I really am a bad person to be around i guess? I really need to stop procrastinating, after all "A good plan 5 minutes from now is better than a great plan 5 months from now" -Patton
  7. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    Oh and i just got fired today. Lucky me. I swear whenever I finally build up the courage to kill myself. I'm going to take every low life son of a bitch I've ever met with me.
  8. jra

    jra Member

    Please, let us try and talk to you.
    We need you as much as you need us.
  9. exkend

    exkend Well-Known Member

    I feel for you matey. Are you isolated? Do you have anyone to share your problems with, your wife perhaps? Have you considered seeing a psychotherpist so at least you have someone to talk to about all your suffering. I would say don't pressure yourself at this time try to find someway to show yourself compassion.

    God Bless
  10. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm sorry to hear that so much is going on in your life all at once. Anyone would be stressed out. Talk to us here and hold on. Things will settle down and then you'll be able to find a way through things in a positive way - you deserve a good life, not an ending.
  11. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    I really am trying to have a good life, really I am.
  12. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    Maybe I should go out with a BANG
  13. Those are bold words sir. I can only begin to imagine the depths of your despair right now, Im often suicidal and I know just how tough it can get. But to take the lives of others with your own is something I could never sit by and let you do without trying to challenge you. To be having such feelings expresses an incredible depth of emotion, and at times like this its easy to let your emotions overwhelm you. Im sure you are good person at heart, those with such depth usually are so please understand the impact such an act would have. You would be stripping them of everything they have and thats an act that none us should be capable of going through. Granted as a race we have and continue to do so but we could, we should, be so much better. Whatever evil they commit, have the sense of morality to rise above their trials. The act of suicide will cut short your existance and you could miss out on so much of who you are yet to become. You have so many ideas left to have, so many people left to know. A whole world of change could await you, your purpose, your very reason needed to stay in existance could still be out there for you to find. You just need to be brave enough to take those steps to find it.

    Its gunna be fucking tough, thats one fact about life I can promise you is true but if you have the bravery to stare into the very eyes of the great unknown that is death then by god, or any other greater meaning you have the bravery to take on the despair in your life. You are on a suicide forum, theres one reason we all come here and theres one reason we all stay, because part of us still has hope in finding a reason to stay. My words may not be enough of a reason for you now, but I can only try to help a soul in equal crisis, if I can help just one person to make it through into a better life then maybe I myself will have found purpose in this world.

    I hope you make it through but for the sake of your mentality, if you do go through with it and plan on taking others with you... it is imperitive that you withold your integrity, you must rise above them to rettain your honour. No man should be so evil as to deprive so many of their loved ones, no man should be so selfish - and I know deep down you know that, as do we all.

    Hang in there man,
    Your comrade in crisis
  14. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    Thank you for the kind words, they really do help. Mostly I'm talking out of anger, though I am very interested in your origin now. Honour instead of honor, means either you live outside the United States or your parents did. Either way thank you for you comforting words again.
  15. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    Two months and I still dont have a job I'm about to lose my house and be homeless. Congratulations to all those that dont give a shit about us. you win
  16. Tired John

    Tired John Well-Known Member

    I hear you. In a very similar place myself, no job for a very long time. Nothing much left to lose. No help in sight from those in the positions that could. Wish I could say some positive things, but I don't have any. Please however, don't let your anger take you to a that ugly place of hurting others, that will only make you feel worse.
  17. Soldier83

    Soldier83 Well-Known Member

    My plan is for tonight when my family is asleep. I am at the end of my rope, I have nowhere else to turn. The world that I used to look at with such vibrant colors, has turned grey. Every talent that I thought I had has not come to fruition. I dont want to live in a world that treats people like this. I dont want to live in a world that every single person in it is trying to get one up on everyone else. I dont want to be a part of a system that takes money from people that truly, and desperately needs it so that someone that has more money than a small country can have another new car. I'm tired of trying to better myself only to have someone come along and rip out my hopes and dreams. I'm so tired of being terrified to have hope. I cant stand it anymore, I just cant stand it anymore. Someone please help me. Please help. Please I dont want to die, but I dont see any other option. Please help
  18. WildCherry

    WildCherry ADMIN

    Please don't do it... I know the world can seem like a cold and cruel place at times, but it isn't always that way. There are genuine people who care.

    Drop me a PM if you need to talk, I'll be around most of the day. :hug: Please don't go through with it.
  19. Unregistered

    Unregistered Member

    Hi, Soldier
    You're back after months, guess you still don't figure out your life yet but you fought to stay until today. Here you are, back in the forum seeking for help, which I'm glad to see. I don't know if I or anyone can help you with anything, but please stay and talk to us. At least we're still with you and listen :)
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