call me Marlboro Man...

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by jimk, Dec 3, 2012.

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  1. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    don't have a horse and not able to ride tall in the saddle like the old commercials.. but do huff and puff the cursed cancer sticks constantly.. start the day with hopes of cutting down with a glimmer of "just maybe one day i will be able to kick these god forsaken damn things.."

    that goes to shit early most days in the middle of the night.. been smoking since 1965.. 47 yrs.. is a miracle me and johnny still alive and not killed us yet.. kicked drugs and hard liquor 33 yrs ago after a confrontation by katie my ex.. them or us made my choice real darn clear. never looked back.. cigarettes is much harder to kick.. real fucking tougher.. almost imposssible for me is the reality.. doctors, shrinks, stop smoking clinic adn friends that almost died from lung cancer and a few that did die (and are missed a hell of a lot) , none of that has stopped me..

    recent yrs made it 2 days without.. but stessors and some total dissociations and always wound up with a fresh supply a puffing away.. thoughts that son johnny might get lung cancer really should do the trick for me.. love him oh so very much and how the damn hell can i still smoke around him.. terrible father and person to continue to do that..

    nicotine is a very powerful drug and even with just a few puffs gives a huge emotional, physical hit just like a severely addicted junkie.. i know this cause i used to be onen of those junkies..

    just tween you and me i just do not know what and how to do it.. am awfullly damn tired of trying to fight this battle.. jim


    PS going to go kiss johnny on the nose and tell himm i love him very much and i am very sorry...........................
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I quit using hypnosis...and I did not fully believe in hypnosis...had two sessions and walked away from an intense habit until my friend had a heart attack, and what did I go to first, that's right, smoking...it is such a hard habit to quit...but keep trying..Zooms deserves it
     
  3. lordsalisbury

    lordsalisbury Well-Known Member

    Hey, I used to be a heavy smoker, and my mum died of throat cancer from smoking, so I absolutely know where you're coming from. The thing that helped me quit was a book called Allen Carr's Easyway to stop smoking (you can pick up a used copy for about the same cost as a packet of smokes). I know it sounds crazy that a book can help you quit, but I promise you, it's really, really helpful (and you can see how many good reviews it has from smokers who have quit). I smoked about 30 a day, and I quit (9 November 2006, 9:30am), and I haven't looked back since.

    Seriously, I highly recommend that you try it. I recommend it to anyone I know who is trying to quit.

    Wishing you all the very best, I know how hard it is, but I'm sure you can do it. :)
     
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Oh Jim, am so there with you!

    Have tried the lot, acupuncture, hypnosis, patches,you name it I've tried it.
    Have never managed to quit and like you, I look at my son, the birds and think "stop for them you selfish bastard!"
    Dad died of lung cancer. grandfather of emphysema, has it stopped me? has it heck as like :mad:

    Am going to try one more time in the new year, going for patches again and the new electronic cigs, but am not holding my breath :sad:
     
  5. FrainBart

    FrainBart Staff Alumni

    Smoking is unhealthy and I am just as guilty of that habit, however (probably isnt great) but most of the harm in smoking is everything that goes with it, why not swap to electronic ciggarettes and you can smoke as normally with out the added side effects on health. Nicotine is addictive, but in it really carries nothing physically harmful. :dunno:
     
  6. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    been hiding from talking about this for few dasy now.. thank you for your thoughts and ideas.. appreciat3ed.. while hiding tried to cut down somek, smoke in garage. another call forced upon me by quit for life program.. lordsalisbury i am so glad for you that you have managed to kick this damn habit.. sadeyes only one question hon: are you smoke free atm or not???? i have tried the allen carr method twice.. did not work for me.. after about 36 hours the missing the nicotine like i was in extemem pain and urge was just overpowering to smoke now..

    the turmoil and stess of attemptijng to quit i feel is going to end my life before the extreme side effecxts of smoking is going to do me in... i am taking a break from trying to stop smoking. not sure how long this break going to last now.. maybe forever and maybe not;;;

    just tired of this war.. Jim
     
  7. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    ((Terry)) did not forget you honey.. john was wanting his breakfast and had to do that before.. you are in the same battle as i am and lord i know what a battle that is.. there is a website quitnet.com which is only for those waging a war on smoking.. has couple of chatrooms in addition to all the forums.. this can give you some needed support and when one is typing it is a lot harder to smoke the cursed things..

    hope after the first of the year you can win this war hon.. need a shoulder at all during this i am as near as youru puter always.. tc, Jim
     
  8. Percarus

    Percarus Account Closed

    Maybe the best way to beat smoking is to take a 3 month holiday to a place you know you won't have access to cigarettes no matter how hard you try and not to take any along with you. Sure, on the plane flight there you may be severely anxious, but if the ticket is bought with a non-refundable condition and expenses are already pre-paid and you have no access to the cancer sticks then you shall be forced towards a recovery.
     
  9. jimk

    jimk Staff Alumni

    all the trying to fight this war constantly has drained me almost totally.. cutting down becomes an obsession and war I am just seeming not going to win.. been smoking since 1965 and I am just a god damn smoker.. too fragile a personality to make it without.. a real nicotine junkie for damn sure...

    cannot even hold it to just a pack a day.. trying for pack and a half a day instead today and for a bit..
     
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