Can anybody relate?

[Zueri]

I posted on another board earlier, and somebody told me I might be a schiz.

I don't know.

I'll describe what's going on with me.
I don't exactly "hear" voices in a typical sense. It's like I'm having a mental conversation with myself, but not. The other "me" seems to know things that I don't. The other "me" wants me to kill me. It tells me to kill me.
I can't sleep, and I can't eat.
Also, I have developed a certain fear of eye contact with people. When I talk to somebody, I stare right past them instead of looking them in the eye.
And yes, I am almost mortally afraid of going out in public. I can practically feel everybody's disdain for me. It's like they're all thinking "She's a loser...Why doesn't she just kill herself?" and I can hear it! It's terrible. I can carry out mental conversations with these people. They tell me who they are, where they come from...things like that. They also tell me that I'm a loser.
What's wrong with me. I can't describe it. I haven't even done a very good job of putting it into words.

I may be posting on the wrong forum. BUT, I want to know...does anybody know what this is? Has anybody experienced this being able to carry out conversations with people whom you've never met in your head?

 

[Right U R Ken]

And yes, I am almost mortally afraid of going out in public.

This part sounds like Agoraphobia. You feel the need to stay in a comfort zone, someplace safe.

As for the rest of it, I'm not sure. You say you carry out mental conversations with people you never met. This is most likely you're own version of the inner dialogue we all have. You can't bear to call yourself a "loser" so you pretend that other people are for whatever reason you have. Stop it immediately. I don't know how to make you stop but you need too. We're all here because we have it rough. But we ourselves shouldn't be the ones making it worse. It hard enough, don't reinforce it.

 

[Zueri]

Thanks!

And wow...I must have a pretty vivid imagination then...If that is the case.


Any other ideas? The voices are driving me insane! Could they somehow have caused a fear of people? Could they be tied to the eye contact issue?

 

[Terry]

Sounds like a hefty dose of paranoia hun. Are u feeling particularly low or anxious, both states can make a person feel afraid and paranoid. A trip to your docs might be in order here. Let me know how u get on.

 

[Right U R Ken]

The eye contact thing and fear of people sounds like shyness/low self-esteem. It's a feeling that you'er not good enough to look people in the eye and that they are thinking something bad about you even though they're not.

I don't know you're situation so I can't get into depth about it all. obviously something bad happened to you and you feel it's you're fault(even though it isn't) and you deveoped this low self-esteem problem over it. It seems your problem is getting very extreme since it's going as far as hearing voices. You should definietly see a counselor in real life. There's only so much we can do and say here on the web and it's not going to be enough.

 

[lostcat95]

useful site

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paranoid_personality_disorder

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antisocial_personality_disorder

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schizoid_personality_disorder

 

[Zueri]

Thanks for the links.

-big hug-

 

[Scum]

Have you been to the docs about it?

Whatever it is they will be able to help you

 

[BeenThere]

I think it is best to go see a psycologist/psychiatrist for a proper diagnoses. I have conversations with myself though the "voice" in my head i like to view as my conscience.no eye contact/head down as was pointed out has more to do with self esteem etc.Schizophrenia has many faces to it but many distinguishing features.Eg. auditory/visionary hallucunations <sp?> Delusions,Face shows little or no emotion,and the list goes on.Best to talk to a profesional.

 

[TLA]

If you hear voices in your head (brain), it is a sign. Good that you can talk to us about it. I agree with other by getting a proper diagnosis.

BUT, don't get stuck into the "label" phobia. Everything has a name. It is just to differnate on how you get treated. I take an antipsychotic for a medication. I am not psycho (YET!! lol).....you get treated for what mental problem you have. My brother also had the voices. He has been on same med for about 15 years now. Hard to accept, but worth it for your life.

 

[mommyssad]

My cousin is schizophrenic and you have very similar symptons. You should definitely see a professional, if you have not already done so.