Can anyone help with an essay problem

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Lonely101, Dec 12, 2009.

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  1. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    Since all the stress - when I think of an idea, it escapes me to go onto another - its like a game of tag in my head

    and I cant seem to catch it to put it on paper - before another idea comes around - and linking each idea is problematic (before I know it within 1 minute I could have 20 new ideas which are running around in my head like chickens whove had their heads cut off and their bodies are still running around for a while later)

    I feel like literally my brain is washed


    Can anyone help me understand or perhaps help me?


    My work has always been very important to me so.... :( dunno wots wrong
     
  2. nok1888

    nok1888 Well-Known Member

    I think if you just sit the night out in peace and quiet, dont think of anything even the stress. Have a bath, relax, do something you enjoy like watch a good film and have an early night. you might find your more clear headed in the morning. I know relaxing isnt the easiest thing in the world but if you dont let your work bother you for the night it may give you the clear head you need in the morning
     
  3. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    What is it on? I'm only an As-level student so I have no particicular skills but maybe I can help.

    A good rememberance technique is brainstorming btw. Write it down before it escapes.
     
  4. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    Thank you so much, was waiting here for someone to answer me

    :hugtackles:

    Im so scared ---- Im sitting here analyzing,

    I decided to take a small section and analysis that 3 paragraphs - then I produced lots, wot it means in note form

    Then i asked if this taxonomizing is relevant.

    when i have written a line, I keep analyzingg the line...and the line in my head is meaningless

    then my brain feel washed of anything

    and im going in loops - and my brain is moving faster that i cant make meaning out of it ..... its happening all the time .... ideas exist but
    wots it, its a reccurrent problem during and after the stress?

    im really worried i might do things wrong again, and make mistakes and ruin my life or something...maybe thats the problem in the back of my head now, i dunno...
     
  5. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    it feels like paring a pencil non-stop to infinity...thats way my brain feels .... grinding
     
  6. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    i wish i could do it straightforwardly ...... i feel like that guy

    :stars:

    the stars are my thoughts .... cept im not smiling when it happens
     
  7. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    could my brain be slightly effected from loneliness, i havent spoken much to any1 in a few years...lacking interaction/stimulation ... meaning like i had little time to, it wasnt the main facet of my day
     
  8. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    What is the topic of the essay? Simply type to us the topic of the essay. That's all.
     
  9. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    Yeah, and take it one point at a time, don't let it flood around.
     
  10. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    seriously, got a week left

    im not going to do this....omfg

    5 omfg essays......
     
  11. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    Can you ask for an extension? The earlier the better. Start with a template and work up from there, what are they on btw?
     
  12. Prinnctopher's Belt

    Prinnctopher's Belt Antiquities Friend SF Supporter

    Come on, a week isn't that short away. You can get it done, you just need to stay focus like I tell you to. I could help you, but I can't help if you don't want to take the initiative and let me work with you. If you really want help...

    What is the title of the first essay that you will write?
     
  13. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    I thought about it and i dont want to specify wot im studying...not on here....

    tried to work a little more

    then i was thinking i wish id died the first time....i know its a terrible thing...but i just wanna be getting my life on track at this stage, and instead all these loose ends are very large...

    ive been writing little paragraphs as i think of them, whilst reading but im not sure that it will work....automatic without reflection

    becaus my ability to reflect at this stage is gone out the window
     
  14. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    <Mod Edit: Replying to deleted post>

    I suggest you try to keep writing those points and ideas randomly and then structure it all into one big essay, come on! Don't give up...
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 13, 2009
  15. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    If you are having "racing" thoughts as it appears you can get yourself an inexpensive 'digital recorder' to speak your thoughts into as they come.

    If you are asking about what these racing thoughts might indicate, they can be an indication of BPD.
     
  16. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    thanks guys, I had a longer sleep last night, and I woke up happier and clear headed .... been having insomnia for months so its probably sleep

    i know i gotta keep going, cos i am really incredibly better than i was last year...and i am feeling better, but im soo swamped in material,

    to me if i finish this degree its like closure, final closure because i am feeling much better but im scared im not gonna be able to make that closure myself...like ive been struggling for so long...and im progressing everyday much much faster, getting better and better in myself.

    Sleep did the trick, so i think im just incredibly worn out cos ive been working so hard for so long....without really any unwinding or relaxation.


    Plus, my self-esteem went down alot, with my self-image, it went down with me at the time....so... and again, im trying to repair and recover everything at the same time, my college grades, my self, my relationship with everyone and everything .... its a rise, fall, rise, fall....but the rises are prolonging a little longer so i know im getting somewhere....its just involves an incredible alot of energy but im getting there, i hope i get there with finishing this degree tho
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 13, 2009
  17. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    like its been very hard ... i dont think any1 really understands, maybe they dont like me
     
  18. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    There's always somebody that undersands, you just haven't found that person yet, or you can't, and that person can't find you, y'know what I mean...... I feel the same.
     
  19. Lonely101

    Lonely101 Well-Known Member

    thank you for helping me.

    I'm feeling very vulnerable and exposed so to say ... I want to build my strength back

    I feel guilty for feeling vulnerable ... cos I shoulda been stronger but I wasnt
     
  20. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    You are strong already, you gain strength through overcoming experiences, you're strong to have got this far and your strong enough to go further. You're not vulnerable either there's no barrier trying to stop you from getting that degree. I think thats true, your in a good position with an oppertunity you have to take.
     
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