can anyone interpret this feeling? :(

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by asking_advice, Jan 22, 2011.

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  1. asking_advice

    asking_advice Well-Known Member

    i said goodbye to my callmate. he have a lot of experience in life compare me. i know i dont have a feelings for him but im afraid he will suddenly ignore me because i cant give what he wants. it's not easy for me to be len like before when i know he loves me. im clueless in relationship. i dont want him to be my shock absorber in my problems. i know he likes me because im open-minded, willing to listen him, and he pity me. he knows im a suicidal. i did a lot of mistake in internet relationships. i misinterpret the emotion of other people here on net. i thought i love someone but in reality. i just need an attention and love. i dont want to happen it again so i decided to end the communication.

    IM ANNOYED! HE SHOULD NOT TELL ME THAT HE LOVES ME! SO I DONT HURT LIKE THIS! I DONT WANT TO LOST THE FRIENDSHIP BUT I NEED TO DO IT FOR MYSELF! I NEED TO PROTECT MYSELF. EVERYTHING IS FINE UNTIL HE SAID HE LOVES ME :(
     
  2. jota1

    jota1 Well-Known Member

    I dont think you need help in interpreting your feelings, you have done a wonderful job of it and your conclusion, in my opinion, is correct.
     
  3. Isabel

    Isabel Staff Alumni

    I agree with Jota1. I would add that it is important to keep in mind that your callmate had every rights to be honest toward you with his feelings. As you have the right to respond to them as you see fit. Sometimes, we would prefer for things to remain unsaid so we can continue the game of extend and pretend when in reality, we have a good idea on what is really going on. I think that maybe you are mad at him because he called for an end of the poker game. He showed you his cards in order to know what are yours. In the long run, it's an healthy move from his part. Obviously everything was not fine for him as he felt the need to talk to you about it.

    To me, it sounds strange that he could both pity you and love you. Pity does not conduce to love. It leads to a lopsided relationship where one nurtures and mentors the other. Its really compassionate love, which is by its nature very different than romantic love. Two people can enter in that kind of relationship if it is understood and agreed upon. Romantic love is another beast altogether. It is based on reciprocity and equality between partners. Just my two cents.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 22, 2011
  4. Ravenwing

    Ravenwing Well-Known Member

    Good advice given here. It seems to me that you have a good grasp on the situation. :hug:
     
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