Can I just tell my story

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Guyonthelake, Sep 27, 2011.

  1. Guyonthelake

    Guyonthelake New Member

    Hey I hate to tell all this but I just really need to vent. I'm 48 yo. I've had 5 failed marriages. About 6 months ago I started having an affair with a coworker. I knew she had a boyfriend and I shouldn't have done it but I did. Well I developed feelings that grew very strong. She told me stuff like I was amazing. I gave her butterflies when I looked at her etc...... Basically everything a lonely man who feels pretty worthless wants to hear. She told me she loved me and stuff like that. Talked about losing her boyfriend and being with me. Well that wasn't happening I kept thinking it would but it didn't. As bad a person as this makes me I truly fell in love with her when I was with her it was like she's my soulmate. When we weren't together she was all I could think about. I came to realize I couldn't love her like that anymore. I can't take loving her yet know she is also with someone else. So last night I ended it. Now I feel like my best friend in the world is gone. I want her more than anything. Now there is a pain in my very soul like I have never felt. I really wish I would go to sleep and just die. I don't know if I can take this much longer.
     
  2. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    I am no expert with relationships. Far from that, in fact. Never been in one. But at the same time I can only imagine what it's like to be in a different stage of life. I can send kind thoughts your way though, and extend to you a great welcome. Hope we are able to take the time here to get to know you better. Cheers.
     
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    All I know is it won't always be this bad. It took me a year to get over my ex and she ripped me off for $18,000... I didn't care about the money I just wanted her..Now I am 54 and not looking anymore..I don't mind being alone.. I live with my sister who also is divorced..You just kind of get over it and enjoy yourself..At least thats what she tells me.. I have too many psych problems that I just don't think about it..I hope you are able to get past her soon.. Maybe a therapist for a while would be benficial...