Can I start a new life...?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Marti2003, Jul 26, 2011.

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  1. Marti2003

    Marti2003 Well-Known Member

    With some help from a pschyciatrist and medication, I think in the long term it willl not have it effects anymore. I was better so to speak, but it feels so clinical and fake, it is like it keep me in balance, but I still have the same thoughts. Sure It keep me from thinking it and being less down, but I feel already that the effects are closing down again and that I feel more and more upset and emotional again. Even thinking of death again... Is not good, but things are still the same, only medication is trying to keep my head up, but that is going away already. My moods are down again... Last week I said to my pscyciatrist that everything is fine with me now, but I lied... I hope I do not fall deeply in a black hole... I wish I could go away from here and start a new life somewhere else...
     
    Marti2003, Jul 26, 2011
    #1
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hi, Marti,

    I think we need to tell our docs/therapists when the meds aren't working so they can adjust dosage, try another one, add something...

    We can start new lives, but we need to settle our present issues first. And that settling is not an overnight process. Maybe you could tell the doc that you'd like help in setting up a "coping plan" for when you feel you are sliding down. That way you will be taking an active step that helps you to help yourself. And helping yourself will also make you feel better. "Empowerment" and self-care are good tools.

    Thinking of you and hoping you feel better soon. Stay safe, hun.
     
    Acy, Jul 26, 2011
    #2
  3. pancake111

    pancake111 Well-Known Member

    I know how you feel, and I kinda feel the same way right now. I don't feel very depressed anymore, but I don't feel happy. Like you said, "it feels fake".

    I think what we need to do is try to start a different life. We are now longer the same person before and after the depression (at least for me) and we need to change the way we think. It would be so easy for me to just sink back into the dark world of depression because it's where I'm comfortably (and miserable).

    You need to tell your psychiatrist how your feeling, and start a new day.
     
    pancake111, Jul 26, 2011
    #3
  4. roscho

    roscho Well-Known Member

    I am going through a situation that has me starting a new life. It is very difficult in my situation because the person that has shattered my mind, has also shattered my self confidence and self worth.

    I'm a few days to a couple weeks away from picking up what I have left and moving over a thousand miles away, where I will have no friends. But at least I will have me. From there I'll have to build a new world. I'm scared to death, but I know after 15 years in the place I am what will happen if I don't make a full break.

    I have to be as strong as I've ever been. And that scares me. It's a fear I have to face, though. I'm not running away from my life, I'm running to my life.

    Be strong.
     
    roscho, Jul 26, 2011
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  5. Sleepwalk

    Sleepwalk Well-Known Member

    Personally I've been off the meds for some time now, though I should probably be on something. I've been on 3 different antidepressants four times and I have found each time that I still felt like crap, I just didn't care that I felt like crap.

    I've been trying to fight off the depression and mood swings with only a multivitamin called Daily Joy, which is high in D and B vitamins. It actually helps more than any prescribed med I've taken but is far from being a cure-all.
     
    Sleepwalk, Jul 26, 2011
    #5
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