Nobody listens and nobody feels the upset like this; I said to them after overdosing leSs than a week ago i needed a few days in hospital to pull me through as I was still actively suicidal: the crisis team and my care coordinator have just left me be and said I wasn't severe enough: they have given me help for a week and just left me to I said I needed help and noone came to give me any but instead a psychiatrist gave a leaflet on self harm to someone to give to me instead! I decided to just leave for a few days and decided if I wanted to take something then I just would and given the fact that they are meant to be in touch daily; not a single person has bEen in touch or been concerned I've not spoken to anyone for such a length of time. So they don't care if I'm alive either: fantastic It feels like it is all far too much: like someone can be left and I'll just make it through! Anytime off is difficult enough without this also. I feel really bad about wanting to die and maybe upsetting some people but even now it feels like I've got to the point where they are just there as a test to see how much I want to do this: like they can't be real in my life anyway so must just be a figure of my imagination for me to resolve myself over and they no longer seem real to me so are no longer a problem. I am through!! All of this crap can be left for someone else to deal with as I've had karmas share!