Um, Hello.. This is actually the first time i've written on a message board.. It's just, I can't talk to anyone else.. My name is Zanaria.. I am 14 years of age.. I hate being in public.. I hate going to parties. I hate talking to people outside of the internet.. Because of my lack of social skills, i've been targeted numorous times.. Even by my family members. I am often called lazy, and a slob. My family wants me to be "normal" like them.. I have different opinions than them which often leads to arguements.. I had attempted suicide I believe 4 or 5 times (I can't remember..) in the past 5 years.. I tried to overdose on pills, and on the third attempt I was admitted to a mental asylum.. The treatment there wasn't in the least bit helpful.. My first day, people pointed and laughed at me.. Few days later, I got beat up by one of the other teenage girls named, Renee.. On my last night there, my two roomates tortured me.. I was so happy to leave. My most recent attempted, I wrote a suicide note in the notes sections on my ipod, and was saying goodbye to all the amazing people I've met on Tumblr.. They asked me where was I going, and i told them I wanted to die.. They responded with messages telling that i shouldn't do it.. But, I had already took the pills.. 4/5 of a regular sized perscription bottle.. I talked to them all in a little chat room I made in Chatzy, and stayed up all night talking to them, even though I had to go to school in the morning.. But, lately i've been thinking about it again, mostly due to my sister yelling and cursing me out about how useless i am.. I already know I'm a completely useless teenage girl.. Nothing I do, ever pleases anyone.. I wish I could be perfect in their eyes. Can someone please just listen?